
YOU GO, LUGO
Well, the Sox's signing of Julio Lugo certainly makes sense in a Casey Stengel sort of way -- which is to say, if Theo didn't acquire somebody to play shortstop, an unusual number of ground balls were going to wind up in left centerfield this season. Past the obvious, The Cow regards Lugo as an underrated player (at least until this payday) -- can play a little D, can certainly run, has a little pop to go with a pretty good OBP, and has recently added versatitlity to his bag of goodies [not greaties]. The team has had something of an unhealthy obsession with him the last couple of years, to be sure. The Cow is reflexively wary of anyone who has ever worn the uniform of the Devil Dogs, which greatly increases the odds of this relationship ending in disaster -- a mental breakdown [Dewon Brazelton, Russ Johnson], anti-social behavior resulting in a long suspension [Delmon Young, Elijah Dukes], a shooting [Nick Bierbrodt], jail [Toe Nash], etc., but after chewing the cud over it for a few hours, The Cow generally gives hooves-up. The money? Can't even fathom it, anymore.
AFTER IT RAINES, IT SHINES
The Cow would like to send a moo out to an old friend, Razor Shines, and congratulate him on his return to The Show as the new third base coach of the White Sox. He is fondly remembered. As a teenage calf, The Cow was a regular at Memphis Chicks games, then the AA affiliate for the Expos. Tim McCarver Stadium would frequently run a two-bit [25 cent] beer night, and The Cow and his friends, having consumed the liquid product a couple of bucks would yield, would find Razor's name amusing, and his bat scintillating, particularly in the clutch. Quite a few future big leaguers came through that team. One of them was Tim Raines, who lost his coaching job when Razor got the call; The Cow wonders if they are even aware of the connection. Another player to toil in Memphis while The Cow was grazing in the stands? Terry Francona.
In the comments, The Cow is interested in hearing about others' experiences attending minor league baseball.
LET MANNY BE ... SOMETHING ALREADY
Enough! The back-and-forth on Manny's fate feels like being fed through a meat grinder ... and The Cow doesn't like the feeling of being fed through a meat grinder. Manny is the greatest right-handed hitter The Cow has ever seen, but the official position on this here at TO'LC is: if the team signs Drew and can get enough in return, well, then Let Wily Mo be Wily Mo.
TROY O'LEARY FUN FACT #1
TO'LC's patron saint ended up his playing career with the Cubbies in '03. His last hit ever in a big league uni was a pinch-hit dinger in Game 7 of the NLCS off of ... Josh Beckett. As a South Florida bovine, The Cow will have plenty to say about Mr. Beckett in upcoming posts.
MEAT MARKET
The Cow rates a few of the NL signings so far:
Juan Pierre - Cubs - 5 years: The Cow is ambivalent on this one. Pierre is a great guy to have on a winning team -- legendarily hard-worker, ebullient, catalyst, stirs the drink -- but on a losing team he's, well, the guy with the noodle arm everybody keeps taking extra bases on. The Cubs look like a losing team for the foreseeable future. Two milksquirts.
Dave Roberts - Giants - 3 years: The Cow smiles and remembers the stolen base. No opinion on the signing.
Alfonso Soriano - Cubs - a lot of years, a lot of money: The Cow remembers how anemic Soriano was in the '03 World Series, when it counted. But the Cubs ... three milksquirts.
Mark DeRosa - Cubs - 3 years: The Cow passes out. They must be kidding. On the strength of a hot couple of months? He did go to Penn, though, so that impresses The Cow [unless he partook in the cheesesteaks at Abner's on campus; The Cow doesn't approve of steak sandwiches].
MILKALANEOUS
When The Cow feels like boogying in the pasture, he likes to listen to CAKE. And not because it's made with milk ... not only because it's made with milk. "Sheep go to heaven, goats go to hell." Cows go to Fenway.
The only Yankees player The Cow can tolerate is Milky Cabrera.
The Cow would like to throw a scooby snack to his 14-year old daughter, the incredible Dana (a.k.a The Great Dane) for her technical expertise and image management in getting set up here in the barnyard. Thanks, Dane!!


Ashley Allen
Kayla Oberg



Comments (8) Add A Comment
Very funny, all of it. But ya know we got some cows in the Bronx, too. Your favorite, Milky, and there's Moo Riviera, Mike Moosina, And the barnyard has a 6-foot-10 donkey.
At the old Dudley field in El Paso, summer of 88, right on the Mexican border, the Diablos were the next to last stop for 19 year old Gary Sheffield before he made his smiling debut for the Brewers later that summer. He was all smiles then, too.
bronxtale
Total Comments (116)
I'm reading your El Paso memories while "Glory Road" is playing on my TV. Life is full of coincidences.
Howard Camerik
Weston, FL
Total Comments (123)
bronxtale, one other thing: If you were in El Paso in '88, I wonder if you were still there in '92? That's the season the patron saint of this blog won the Texas League batting title with a .334 average for the Diablos.
Howard Camerik
Weston, FL
Total Comments (123)
Not in '92. Just visiting friends each time but saw the Diablos in their new ballpark in summer of 91, Andy Cohen Stadium, not nearly as much fun as Dudley Field, known as the Deadly Dome. .
bronxtale
Total Comments (116)
Ok, was there with cow dude for most if not all of those 2 bit beer nights, so my memories of those days are a little fuzzy to say the least. Some other big leaguers coming through - Tim Wallach, Charlie Lea and in the post Expo years Bo Jackson and I know there were others. Also remember answering the trivia question almost every night so we'd have 2 tickets for the next game. And how about 1 more forgotten player on the all name team.....Grayling Tobias.
Post Cards
Memphis, TN
Total Comments (1)
I know who that is ...
You freaked me out with Grayling Tobias. And now for the rest of the 1978-1980 Memphis Chicks I remember who made it to "The Show": Tony Phillips, Al Newman, Wallace Johnson, Mike Fuentes, Bryn Smith, Dave Hostetler, Brad Mills, and one who might be able to rival Tobias ... catcher extraordinaire Tom Wieghaus.
Howard Camerik
Weston, FL
Total Comments (123)
I t hink I went to law school with the guy who left comment #5.
Vinny
Hudson, OH
Total Comments (1)
Vinny Bagadonutz ... you did not go to law school with comment # 5, who is a proud non-lawyer, and a high school barnyard-mate of The Cow.
But you, Vinny, did bring barnyard amusement to The Cow at the Metrodome when you suggested that one of the Twins' faithful put his pig on a leash.
Howard Camerik
Weston, FL
Total Comments (123)
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