Super Bowl a Religious Experience

(10 minutes before kickoff, and Blutwulf is watching the game with his wife.)

Blutwulf:  No, baby.  Cinderella stories are fun, and all, but this time there is no realistic chance for the underdog.  The Patriots are a machine this season.

Mrs. Blutwulf: Well I'll root for them anyay.  You said that the last two times.  This time it is Eli's turn.

Blutwulf:  Whatever, baby.  Just don't get your hopes up.

Mrs. Blutwulf:  I thought you hated the Patriots.

Blutwulf:  Well, I don't hate any team, and even if I did, I am sane enough to still rate them.

(The singing of the national anthem...)

Mrs. Blutwulf: It's Jordan from American Idol!

Blutwulf: Man, she looks nervous.  I hope she doesn't screw up.

Mrs. Blutwulf: Didn't you say her dad played football?

Blutwulf: Er, yeah...  Phillipi Sparks...

Mrs. Blutwulf:  Who'd he play for?

Blutwulf: ...the Giants.  Cornerba...

Mrs. Blutwulf:  IT IS A SIGN, hahahahaha.

Blutwulf:  Baby, this isn't a made-for-TV-movie.  The Giants are toast.

(Halftime...)

Mrs. Blutwulf:  They'll win.

Blutwulf: ...it is possible.

Mrs. Blutwulf:  See?  I told you.  God wants them to win.

Blutwulf:  Oh, like God cares who w... never mind.  Whatever, Baby.  You still gotta put the smart money on the Giants.

Mrs. Blutwulf: What happend to the Patriots?  Why are they doing so bad?

Blutwulf: Heh... The Giants probably aren't using defensive signals.

Mrs. Blutwulf: What?

Blutwulf: Look at Petty... Elvis, then Dylan, and now Petty.  The guy is as American as you can get, and his music is on every jukebox on the planet.

Mrs. Blutwulf:  God wants them to win.

Blutwulf: *sigh*

(The final quarter...)

Mrs. Blutwulf: What does that mean?

Blutwulf: It means they get 7, and are ahead by 4.  The Giants need a TD. A field goal won't help them.  They have the time, but their offense is pretty weak.  Don't get your hopes up, Baby.

Mrs. Blutwulf: Oh, they'll win.

Blutwulf: Moss walked in.  The defender slipped.  Where was God on that one?  You sure He wants the Giants to win?

Mrs. Blutwulf: Yep.

Blutwulf: *sigh*

(Later...)

Blutwulf: Oh, nice return.  My mamma could have returned that for more than 15.

Mrs. Blutwulf: What's this mean?

Blutwulf: The Giants gotta go about 85 yards.  Ain't gonna happen.

Mrs. Blutwulf: Now what is happening?

Blutwulf: 3'rd and 5.  Patriots are about to take away the middle, and the Giants are weak on sides.  Belichick has removed all the less-than-10 inside routes.  No idea what they'll do... Oh.  My.  God.

Mrs. Blutwulf: Did he catch it?

Blutwulf: On his helmet.

Mrs. Blutwulf: See?  God wants...

Blutwulf: Well, the field is shorter now, and the defenders have less field to cover, and it will be tougher.  Baby, I seriously don't hink that Manning can... I.  Will. Be. Damned.

(Entering from other room...)

Mrs. Blutwulf: (with plate) Peanut butter candy?

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