HILLARY - Gee, Barack, you sure look sexy in your Somali goat herding suit! I always dreamed about a man who was handy around goats.
BARACK - What about your husband, ol' fat Bubba?
HILLARY - He only likes pigs.
BARACK - The most important thing you have to learn about milking a goat is that you have to grab the teat hard, squeeze and pull.
HILLARY - Oooh! Look at all the milk that came out!
BARACK - That's a male goat.
HILLARY - Barack, we have to resolve who is going to be in charge of herding the goats, me or you. I feel I have the most experience managing livestock from my years in Washington.
HILLARY - Where did you learn all that?
BARACK - Chicago.
HILLARY - Say, isn't that where all the slaughterhouses are located?
BARACK - Not so loud! If the goats hear that word they'll stampede!
HILLARY - It must get lonely sometimes being up here in these hills with just goats for company.
BARACK - Actually, goats can be quite romantic once you get past the smell.
HILLARY - Goats are romantic!??
BARACK - It's a lot like being with my wife, though they don't talk as much.
HILLARY - But sometimes you must feel the need to have a soft, warm woman around.
BARACK - Well, naturally I need some support in my role as head goatmaster.
HILLARY - Wait a minute! Who elected you?
BARACK - The goats have spoken.
HILLARY - Not so fast, buster! It's not over until the fat lady sings!
BARACK - I didn't know you could carry a tune.
HILLARY - The goats have already spoken. They want me!
BARACK - No, me!
HILLARY - There's one way to settle this. Flip a coin. Heads I win, tails you lose.
BARACK - Wait a minute! That coin's got two heads on it!
HILLARY - Any man knows that two heads are better than one. Anyway, forget this. Let's let the superdelegates decide.
BARACK - Who are the superdelegates?
HILLARY - My husband Bubba, my daughter Chelsea and my dog Buddy.
BARACK - Your dog is a superdelegate?
HILLARY - Yeah, he represents New Jersey. Don't worry, they're used to it.
BARACK - Well, I want my slate of delegates.
HILLARY - Who are they?
BARACK - OJ, Pacman Jones and Michael Vick.
HILLARY - Hey, those guys are all crooks!
BARACK - Nobody's perfect.