Posted by:
dudeman is back. maybe.

FN is a diverse community with much drama going I will be writing a soap opera for FN. If you want a cameo, just Fanmail me and you WILL get one guaranteed or else you will get your money back. This will be coming every Friday.


Viewer Discretion is Advised...

We fade into a boardroom. The Jury in the Goodell case is contemplating their ruling before announcing it to the public at a press conference:

Bigalke: Personally, I think that Goodell is guilty. I mean c'mon. We all know he's ALWAYS wanted David's TD record. It was the perfect time.

Buddhasillegitimatechild: I don't understand why he would take the risk of getting himself shot at.

'Ey Capernicus: It's the perfect cover up...I mean who would guess that the guy getting shot at would be the criminal?

Da 'Masta: In that case, NCshvDavid should be a suspect.

Hemogoblin: But, NCshvDavid actually got shot...anyway what would his motive be?

Coletrain: Maybe the gunman screwed up...maybe Goodell was the one who was supposed to be shot and NCshvDavid was supposed to be grazed.

Hemogoblin: Still waiting for a motive...

Steveo: Think about it. Behind NCshvDavid and Goodell there's Bombers. He's waaaaay back there. If NCshvDavid took Goodell out he would have a comfortable lead.

Cincy: It does make sense.

Esco: Both motives make sense. We can't get BSchwartz to question NCshvDavid, because he's still in critical condition.

Bigalke: I thought he was sent home.

Coletrain: Yea, his release from the hospital was on FN News at 9 yesterday.

Da 'Masta: He lost to Dudeman...damn Dudeman is a GREAT TDer.

Steveo: Wow, this is confusing.

Buddhasillegitimatechild: Notice how we ruled out the possiblity of this shooter being a third party.

'Ey Capernicus: Well, there's over 195,000 people in the FN Community, so the possibilities are endless.

Cincy: Speaking of the FN Community, there have been 2 other incidents involving the FN Community.

Esco: Yea, Gu3 was shot with a poison dart, and than kidnapped.

Bigalke: Dan was also kidnapped.

Coletrain: We might have to enlist the help of the FN FBI.

Da 'Masta: Before we do that we need to get to the bottom of this case.

Hemogoblin: That's going to take a long time.

The boardroom door suddenly, and in walks eaglemaniac.

Cincy: You are here, why?

Eaglemaniac: The FNPD just found evidence at TD Arena concerning this case.

Steveo: Go on.

Eaglemaniac: They found an AK47 in section 34B.

Buddhasillegitimatechild: We should track down a list of the people sitting in that section on the day of the shootings.

The boardroom phone starts ringing. Esco picks up.

Esco: Hello?

Unknown Voice (raspy): Hello. I presume this is a member of the Jury for the Goodell case.

Esco: Your presumption is correct. Now, please tell me who this is.

Unknown Voice (raspy): You will know at the right time. For now my identity will stay concealed.

Esco: Sir, we have a crew of men who are figuring out your location at this moment.

But the caller called Esco's bluff.

Unknown voice (raspy): Than why haven't you caught me yet? I'm in the boardroom closet!

Esco signals to 'Ey Capernicus to open the closet door. There is nothing in there.

Esco: Stop playing games. Tell me what you want.

Unknown voice (raspy): All I want is for the world to know that I was the one who fired upon Goodell and NCshvDavid at TD Arena that night.

The shooter cuts the phone line. Esco looks stunned at recited what he just heard to the rest of the Jury memebers. We fade out of the boardroom and into a Soccer T&R. 

Unknown Voice 1: The call went good. They have no idea.

Unknown Voice 2: I love the place...a Soccer T&R! No one will ever find us here.

Gu3: You'll never get away with this!

Unknown Voice 2: Shut up kid. You don't know nothing.

Gu3: I know that you have bad grammar.

Unknown Voice 3: Keep that voice up, and you'll get your ass handed to you.

Unknown Voice 2: He's right. Shut up and sit tight. You aren't going anywhere for a long time.

Dan: What about me?!?!

Unknown Voice 1: Same goes for you. Either you shut up too, or we take you out.

Unknown Voice 3: We have to execute the next phase of our plan.

Unknown Voice 1: Not right now. First we relish in our success.

Unknown Voice 2: I'll get the champagne.

As the three men celebrate we fade to black.

***Commercial Break***

Greg Oden - Boom

Tony Romo - Yawn

Joe Buck is tired

We fade back into Josh's apartment. Danbash and Denis are trying to get some clues from Josh.

Denis: How long have you known Dan?

Josh: About 1 year.

Danbash: What's your relationship with Dan?

Josh: We have been best friends since the time we met.

Denis: Hmm...interesting.

Danbash: Was he in anyway distressed before the kidnapping.

Josh: Other than the fact that his blogs aren't as good as mine he's been fine.

Denis: While being in the community, did he gain any enemies?

Josh: Everyone always liked him. There's one person who I have on my mind, though.

Danbash: Share with us please.

Josh: Well, Big Ben has always thought Dan was a cocky jerk.

Denis: Is this reaction stemming from an incident of any kind?

Josh: Well, at one point in time they were fighting over the fact that Ben always voted against him in his TDs.

Danbash: Can you give us some more details?

Josh: Dan was TDing and Ben voted against him. Dan felt like Ben was unfairly voting in his TDs. It got pretty ugly. The Mods had to delete it.

Denis: Thank you Josh. We will look further into the rift between Dan and Ben.

We fade out of Josh's apartment, and into a hospital room.

Nomarfan: What did I tell you?

NCshvDavid: Umm...not to lose a TD.

Nomarfan: What did you go and do?

NCshvDavid: Lost a TD...

Nomarfan: Exactly.

NCshvDavid: It's not my fault. Dudeman is the best TDer I've ever seen!

Nomarfan: Not to mention his blogging abilities...anyway, now you re-injured your injury.

NCshvDavid: I know that.

Nomarfan: Apparently not, because you were stupid enough to TD Dudeman. You knew you were going to lose!

NCshvDavid: So, I liked the challenge.

Nomarfan: Now, your injured again. You have to stay in here for another week now.

NCshvDavid: Are you sure...can you let me out early?

Nomarfan: No.

NCshvDavid slips Nomarfan a 20.

NCshvDavid (winks): How about now?

Nomarfan: Still a no, but thanks for paying for my lunch!

NCshvDavid: C'mon.

Nomarfan: NCshvDavid, you have an addiction. I recommend seeing a specialist.

NCshvDavid: Ew no.

Nomarfan: Screw it. I'm not going to recommend one.

NCshvDavid: Good.

Nomarfan: I'm demanding one. The team of Dyhard and Hiya can easily get you over your addiction.

NCshvDavid: But, I don't need help.

Nomarfan: Yes you do. They'll come in tomorrow. You have a serious problem NCshvDavid. At one point in time you did 12 TDs in one night!

NCshvDavid: It's fun...

Nomarfan: That's what crackheads say. I'm sorry. You need help, and the team of Dyhard and Hiya will give you just that.

NCshvDavid (rolls eyes): Ugghh. 

As NCshvDavid becomes more and more exasperated, we fade to black.

***Commercial Break***

Mr. Met

Competition in SportsCenter

Mean Joe Green

As the Roy House impersonating a woman press conference ends, the Goodell Case press conference begins. Bigalke steps up to the Podium.

Bigalke: You all are here too find out the Jury's verdict, I believe. Well, the case has taken a new turn. We cannot release the information to the public at this moment, but we believe we have a great lead on the shooter. Goodell isn't the shooter and we can confirm that. Also, we will enlist the help of the FN FBI.

As Bigalke steps down from the podium we fade to black than we fade into the FN Park.

Big Ben: Baby, I can't get enough of you.

Tracy: Me too, snickerdoodle.

Denis and Danbash walk up to the two lovebirds and start questioning Ben.

Denis: So Ben, what are your feelings about Dan?

Danbash: Yeah, what are they?

Big Ben: Who are you guys?

Denis: Just answer the questions.

Big Ben: Hell no, I'm out of here.

Danbash: The police will be after you!

Big Ben picks up Tracy and carries her to his car. He drives away. Denis and Danbash inform the Police. Big Ben now has a warrant out for him.

That's the end of the 3rd volume. I keep on running out of colors for the names, so for now on they will be bolded and underlined.

Like the new name? All the credit goes to Tracy.

Tell how you feel about it in the comments.


Remember to keep your posts clean. Profanity will get filtered, and offensive comments will be removed.

Start Your Own Blog

Start Now

Truth & Rumors


  1. 1
    'Melo wants to be wooed (like, Howard wooed)
  2. 2
    Farrell defends Fenway's 'sleep room'
  3. 3
    Youthful Red Wings are rattled
  4. 4
    Bishop's severe injury
  5. 5
    Texans may take Clowney ... for someone else

SI Photos