Bracket Gods? | The Blog That is Better Than Yours

Since when have you known me, Erwin, maybe one of the strangest people you've ever met, to be good at anything?

Um, probably never, unless you're hiding a camera in my apartment or something. Or in my shower. Wait, that's siht. If you are doing that, you're a pervert.

So I would hope you're not, but I know for some people it's not possible to resist the urge. So go right ahead and I'll have you arrested and thrown in the clink.

I am good at 2 things though: fantasy sports and brackets. I won the Bracket Club competition in my high school last year.

So far, I've gotten 2 games wrong on my Seth Davis Bracket Challenge bracket, but who cares? I'm actually good at something!

Of course, when you're as smart with brackets as me, you must have a proven formula for picking, right? Wrong. I pick random teams.

Yes, it's a bizarre phenomenon that's never been seen before. Someone who can win their pool just picking random teams.

One person who comes along once in a lifetime. That is me.

I predicted that Duke-Belmont would go down to the wire in my Microsoft Word sports journal. The score I had was 67-64, Duke. The actual score: 71-70, Duke.

That's pretty odd. But it's because I was born with a gift. From the bracket gods.

For every child that is born, every single second, the bracket gods are analyzing the child. They have the incredible ability to go into the child's brain and pick it apart. They study the parents' DNA.

Then, if the child is deemed worthy, the bracket gods give the child the gift: the gift to pick a perfect bracket. Only one in their entire lifetime. But, the child never knows about this gift. Except for me.

In the midst of last year's NCAA tournament, I was in shambles. I had lost 2 games on my bracket on day and was afraid of being overtaken for my bracket club points lead. Then, as I dozed off to sleep at about 3 in the morning, I had a dream.

I was in a cloud, waiting for something. I was wearing an Ohio State cap. I throw it down. It falls through the cloud, never to return.

Suddenly, the cloud jerks. I stand up hastily. The cloud begins moving, where I make out an arch-shaped structure from the distance.

It is gray and foggy out. Everything is dark. But I see the arch structure, and as I move closer, I realize it's a gate.

I thought I'd have to say a password or something to get in. But the cloud just took me right through the gate. I felt myself. I was transparent and ghostly.

I asked myself, "Is this heaven?" But, the cloud seems to understand me. It turns in a circle. I take that as a no.

Then, I am taken into a room, where I see a dark figure. It turns around. It has no face. It wears an Ohio State basketball jersey.

Then, I realize I've met the one who gave me a rare gift. And, suddenly, my alarm wakes me up.

It was just like that. And I know I've been given a rare gift.

So, I then picked the rest of the games correctly, and won the competition. And I had the bracket gods to thank.