It's time to break down tonight's Kansas-Memphis NCAA championship game. If you want to know what to look for on the floor, try my occasional officemates, Luke Winn and Stewart Mandel. They've actually been sent to San Antonio like real sportswriters.
If you're a fellow couch potato who wants to know what to expect from CBS's coverage, you've come to the right place. Here's what you should be on the lookout for:
10. When Kansas wins opening tip, Billy Packer shouts, "This game is over!"
9. One Shining Moment montage includes nearly as many cheerleader shots as SI.com
8. Over/under set at three for gratuitous Tyler Hansbrough mentions
7. Several jokes about Memphis PG Derrick Rose's diet of Gummi Bears and Twizzlers
6. Jim Nantz uncorks corny canned line at game's end like, "What a Rush; the Jayhawks are champions"
5. Minimum of one forced "Remember the Alamo" pun
4. Tigers (of Memphis) will be overshadowed by Masters promos with Tiger Woods
3. Packer will spout coaching strategy with such certainty one might think he actually had been one
2. You'll come no closer to deciding whether you love or hate those chatty Sonic commercials
1. They pre-empted How I Met Your Mother for this?
Anne V
Yasmin Brunet
Baseball's $100 Million Men
Mavs Dancers
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Is there a game tonight?
Rickapolis-Bard of…
Annapolis , MD
Total Comments (5314)
Does anybody really want to say here in public they watch How I Met Your Mother?
LOL
O O
LOL
Cassidy's House:…
Whatsittoya, NO
Total Comments (14890)
Congrats to all of the Kansas fans.
Those boys can sure play ball. It was almost...unsportsmanlike, the way the pummelled the UNC.
*rips up brackets, kisses money goodbye*
Kari - DaPrez
Geneva , IL
Total Comments (7424)
Forced puns? Bad lines? In a sports broadcast?
Anthony Verna
New York , NY
Total Comments (5741)
9. One Shining Moment montage includes nearly as many Tyler H. shots as SI.com..if not more
Skooter23g
Total Comments (7444)
I would take the over on the Tyler mentions...he won this award, he won that award, he was denied, he was frustrated by the KU defense, he is 3 time all american, he is prime example of what college b ball is about...
and that's just in the pregame...
gill_
Total Comments (9374)
...and he does a mean flop
Lisa - Go Big Blue!
Total Comments (2679)
Rock and KS: one more to go for you. They were awesome on Saturday, with a capital A. Sorry for the Dickie V phrase but I can tolerate him more than Packer.
big west
Total Comments (2486)
Ku or Memphis will win because Tyler willed it to happen
Skooter23g
Total Comments (7444)
Apparently Tyler Hansbrough was unable to will his team into the championship game but at least one voter will still vote UNC #1 due to his will.
BoFett
Total Comments (4198)
How about 'The Biggest Game on the Biggest Stage'?
I expect to hear BIG a lot since they are in Texas.
Rickapolis-Bard of…
Annapolis , MD
Total Comments (5314)
They better not take away my Wheel of Fortune or Jeopardy. My bracket's already over, so I don't care about the game.
DJ C - Pete 3:16
Total Comments (10995)
Thanks, Big W. The office is crazy today. Finals tonight and the home opener for the Royals tomorrow.
I used to work for the agency that creates the Sonic commercials.
KS Elwood
Merriam, KS
Total Comments (3420)
"I don't really want to talk about leaving" Hansbrough said.
Of course, he said the same thing when he was in high school.
Jen's Apparition
Total Comments (4953)
Mornin' Kari. I know how you feel. I had UNC & UCLA in the finals. Good to see they let me down.
DJ C - Pete 3:16
Total Comments (10995)
What's the over/under on comments about Derrick Rose's band-aid?
FGB
Neyland Stadium, TN
Total Comments (6670)
Jim Nantz begins practicing his golf whisper prompting Billy Packer to hit him in the head with a steel chair.
BoFett
Total Comments (4198)
Of course, he said the same thing when he was in high school.
Jen - Even Huger Kansas Fan
***
You cried then and you will cry now.
Hart -
Edgerton , OH
Total Comments (1289)
The Ohio State University runs an ad proclaiming themselves as national champion since they won the NIT.
BoFett
Total Comments (4198)
Whats everyone's prediction for tonight, Elmwood, I am pretty sure I know yours.
Hart -
Edgerton , OH
Total Comments (1289)
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