200motels's Blog
Views
1134
Comments
0

Get out of the way Tori & Dean, and make way for America's Wackiest Couple:

THE A-ROD & MADONNA SHOW!

This week featuring special guest star JOBA CHAMBERLAIN!

 

Madonna - A-Rod, honey, is that a baseball bat in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

 

A-Rod - It's a baseball bat.  I want to do some batting practice.  But I can't find my balls.  Have you seen them?

 

Madonna - I'll say!  I was up half the night polishing your balls.  Don't forget, Rabbi Schwartzberg is coming over today to convert you to Judaism.

 

A-Rod - Why do I have to become Jewish?

 

Madonna - Because I only eat kosher meat.

 

[doorbell rings]

 

A-Rod - Someone's at the door now. 

 

Madonna - Why, it's our next-door neighbor, Joba Chamberlain.

 

[audience applause]

 

Joba - Sorry to bother you, but I just happened to be passing by and I smelled food.

 

A-Rod - No problem.  Madonna, will you fix Joba something to eat?

 

Madonna - What would you like, Joba?

 

Joba - I'm not really too hungry.  Could I just have six Big Macs and a dozen donuts?

 

A-Rod - Madonna, have you seen my equipment bag?  I have to return Jason Giambi his gold panties.

 

Madonna - Why don't you get your own gold panties?  Why do you have to borrow Jason's?

 

A-Rod - It's a guy thing.  You wouldn't understand.

 

Madonna - That's what you think!  Anyway, I threw out that stinky old equipment bag.

 

A-Rod - You what?!?!?!!!!

 

Madonna - Don't worry.  I'll buy you a new one.

 

A-Rod - Madonna, you don't understand.  That equipment bag was filled with money.  There was two hundred and seventy-five million dollars in that bag.  George Steinbrenner had to take out a second mortgage on the new stadium to get me that money!

  

 

Madonna - Why didn't you put the money in a bank?

  

 

A-Rod - I was going to, but when I lifted it, I injured my shoulder because the money was so heavy, and   I had to go on the Disabled List.

 

Madonna - Wait, I know!  Maybe they haven't picked up the garbage yet.

 

Joba [talking with food in his mouth] - You're out of luck.  They already picked up the garbage.  I saw them throwing A-Rod's equipment bag in the back of the truck.

 

A-Rod - Oh, no!  I'm broke!

 

Joba - Maybe if we rush over to the garbage dump you can find your bag before it gets covered up too deep in garbage.

 

A-Rod - Good idea!

 

[they all rush out]

 

[A-Rod, Madonna and Joba Chamberlain are at the Great Kills Garbage Dump in Staten Island, where they are standing up to their butts in garbage]

 

  

 

Madonna - Whew, this stinks worse than my last movie!

  

 

Tony the Garbage Man - Wow, this my lucky day!  I'm the luckiest garbage man in New York City!  A-Rod, Madonna and Joba Chamberlain all at my garbage dump!  What are you looking for?

  

 

A-Rod - A gym bag full of money.

  

 

Tony - You mean like this one?

  

 

A-Rod - Hey, that's my bag!  Hey, IT'S EMPTY!  All that's left is a bunch of rat $#!T!

  

 

Tony - The rats must have eaten the money and left you their $#!T for the change.

  

 

A-Rod - Well, we might as well take it along with us.

  

 

Madonna - What are you gonna do with a bag full of rat$#!T?

  

 

A-Rod - Maybe I can take it to Las Vegas and sell it as sports memorabilia.

  

 

Will A-Rod sell the rat$#!T in Las Vegas?  Will his wife, Cynthia, return from Lenny Kravitz' house in Paris and accuse A-Rod of holding her hostage and forcing her to wear the "F*¢& You" t-shirt at Yankee Stadium?  Will Madonna go to the aide of her ex, Keith Hernandez, and smash José Reyes over the head with a dumbbell?  Tune in next week.

THE FINAL ARMAGEDDON BETWEEN GOOD AND EVIL FOUGHT AT FLUSHING MEADOWS! WHO WILL PREVAIL, THE YANKS OR THE METS? READ "THE YANKEES ARMY"
CLICK HERE:
http://www.200motels.net/yanks.html

Comment

Remember to keep your posts clean. Profanity will get filtered, and offensive comments will be removed.


Start Your Own Blog

Start Now

Truth & Rumors

MOST POPULAR

  1. 1
    Bryant headed back to Germany
    Views
    3360
    Comments
    928
  2. 2
    D'Antoni's newest 'blunder'
    Views
    2939
    Comments
    866
  3. 3
    Baseball's top 2015 free agent
    Views
    2530
    Comments
    528
  4. 4
    Shakeup looms for White Sox
    Views
    5294
    Comments
    334
  5. 5
    The NHL's model franchise?
    Views
    2300
    Comments
    140

SI.com

SI Photos