Well howdy yall. I'm from the sunshine state of Florida. Long live the Confederacy. We aint seen no damn yanks in over 140 years now. Guess we won. Anyhow, me and me old lady have some things to say about this here election.
Lets hope this one aint as confussing as the one back in 2000. All those papers and hole punchers thing-a-ma-jigs and the what-chu-a-call-its do-dads. Thank god for good ole Jeb. Boy do we miss him. Thats why I named me dog Jeb.
I may not now much, cause I just a simple person who hangs his twnety guns around his waist, drinking all day and listening to that Fox News. Who doesnt love a good Bill O'Reilly show. Now, its not my place to judge people, but I dont all trust that O'Reilly, seeing as how hes Catholic and what not. Me, well, Im a southern Baptist. We take every Sunday off, go to church at 7 in the morn, stay til 4 at night, and then drink til dawn all the while shooting our hunting rifles into the words, hoping one day we kill a deer.
Anyways, back to this here election season. Cant go wrong with an old white guy. Theres been nothing but white guys, except for Jimmy Carter, in the white house. Why need change? So long as I got me rifle and all those Mexicans stay off me lawn, Ill be fine. Oh, got to go, wrastlin on now. Dont want to miss that.
Ooops, spelt me name wrong.
Oh I wish I was in the land of the cotton. Old times that are not forgotten. Look away, look away, look away, Dixieland.