Lou Holtz is a Doctor...I have my doubts. But this is funny. | Anthony E.'s Blog

Before reading this, watch the video^. Then come back and read this.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Some observations on the new segment for Lou Holtz.

1)The Master of Football Science from ND University.

1a) You know when ND hired Lou Holtz in 1985 because they were coming off a 5-6 season. ((Yes back then 5-6 meant getting the axe at ND...don't ask me why Weis can go 3-9 and stick around...they've lowered the standards I guess)) So now I compare ND going to Lou Holtz like me going to the doctor for an illness. You want that doctor to cure you. So Lou Holtz cured ND. Check. But a good doctor makes sure your illness doesn't come back, and he makes sure you are cured for good. Lou Holtz sure cured ND alll right but when he left, the program experienced a long term decline. So is he a good doctor? No. Just one that took his money and left before the program found out what his real reasons for leaving were. The man was offered a lifetime contract. But we all know he left because he knew that ND was going down the series of tubes...no I was not trying to mention Ted Stevens (but in case you were curious http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f99PcP0aFNE).

2) My mother loves me. 4 Honorary Doctor Degrees (bet you they are from ND). Graduated in the lower half of his stupid class. Yeah that confirms he's a doctor. He's written more books than he's read. I liked that. Will he start out every week's segment like that?

3) First Caller: Tim Tebow. You gotta love how realistic Tebow is. Yeah he might win a second Heisman. But he doesn't want to settle for just another Heisman. He wants to lead his team to more. He's fired up!! He wants to lead his team to a title alright...but he doesn't go as far to say National Title. He's even hesitant to say that he's going for an SEC title. And you gotta love how Holtz goes back to his Catholic school ND roots and tells Tebow how the "good Lord" put eyes in front of your head rather than in the back so you can see where your going instead of where you've been. Great quote, but shouldn't you be encouraging the boy to go for a national title? They are realistic arent they? Good for a doctor to put things into perspective.

4) Last Caller: Lloyd Carr. Well this is a blow to Michigan's Rich Rodriguez. It is. Here Lloyd Carr is the smart one. Not only does he know how to milk 2 seconds back on the clock (see 2005 Mich-PSU game) but he also knows how to really make Michigan feel like crap for not trying to keep this guy at whatever it takes. So the big problem for Carr is his sorry chipping and putting skills since his retirement...boy does Holtz have quite the reply. He has pretty good at dissing the alumni there, and told Carr to bring his wallet to the golf course. I know Michigan doesn't feel guilty about letting Carr go without as much of a peep or anything, but it was an awkward situation. He did leave after a huge bowl win over Florida...but I'm thinking that the way Michigan looks this year after some key guys transferred is just as bad if not completely worse than last year. By the way, you think Rich Rodriguez is going to beat OSU? Yeah thats what I thought.

5) He then after giving some advice, decides to tell everyone in a paraphrasal "Don't listen to me...listen to your spouse."

6) And remember..."Behind every successful man is a surprised mother-in-law."

I look forward to many more of Lou's hilarious segments on ESPN. But for the record Doc Lou, ND isn't good. At all.

Anthony E.