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Even as an NBA fan, I haven't paid too much attention to the New York Knicks lately. Isiah definately can provide great comedy at times, but even still, they haven't done anything spectacularly horrible since the Steve Francis trade. However, it seems all this is about to change. The Knicks recently dumped Mr. Francis and his gigantic contract in a draft day move to acquire troubled but talented Zach Randolph. This information is amusing in it's own right, considering that Isiah is now dealing with two of the most selfish, screwed up players in the NBA with Marbury AND Randolph, but the best just got better today, as rumors circulated that the Knicks would attempt to acquire Ron Artest from Sacremento. So, yes, there is a half decent possbility that Zach Randolph, Ron Artest and Stephon Marbury could form the most disfunctional, yet talented team ever assembled. Personally, I think the Knicks should roll with this. Why have a lineup that's 3/5 wacky when you could go five for five? Hound Detroit to see what they want for Rasheed Wallace, since they have soured on him lately. Talk to Nellie up in Oakland about parting ways with Ron-Ron's good friend Steven Jackson. And definately head up to Minneapolis to try and grab Ricky Davis, king of all crazies. Even head down to East Rutherford to see if you can steal away recent Nets' draft pick Sean Williams, who was kicked off his Boston College team in midseason due to "repeat violations of team rules". If this were to come to fruition, this team would average about 45-50 wins, 5-10 technical fouls per night, over 10 million dollars in fines, 15-20 "locker room incidents" a season, several visits from David Stern, and at least two fights possibly even with some Malace at the Palace type action. I'd even bring in former Kings' head coach Eric Musselman as an assistant. Why, you ask? Because not only could he not handle Artest in his single disastrous season in Sac-town, but he was also cited for driving under the influence immediately before the season began. The Knicks definately need him calling the shots. And, don't get me wrong, James Dolan is a pretty disfunctional owner, with his temper tantrums and the fact that he hired Isiah Thomas as his coach/GM, but they need more. He should see if he can get Mark Cuban to buy in. Which owner does crazy better than Cuban? And you know, Isiah needs a little help in the GM department- why not convince Billy King and Kevin McHale to join the team? They've only wasted the prime of two of the most talented players of our generation with bone headed trades and draft picks- Isiah needs people to bounce his stupid ideas off and who better than these two? Because I believe in going the extra mile, I think the Knicks should arrange for other troubled athletes, such as Pacman Jones, Chris Henry, and Tank Johnson, to appear regularly at the Garden, just to stir things up occasionally. And let's invite TO and OJ Simpson too! And let's...

David Stern just woke up in a cold sweat somewhere. I guess I better stop.