When Bell Helicopters signed on to sponsor the Armed Forces Bowl this year, they only considered it because of the great deal they were given, on account of no one wanting to watch a bowl with a barely eligible military team. But, their corporate headquarters are glad to report a drastic increase in helicopter sales as a result of the new exposure.
"We hear a lot about this bad recession the country is going through," said Bell president Gary Fulmer. "But ever since we were featured in front of a bowl, sales have really picked up. People are buying lots of helicopters, and even adding some of the expensive accessory packages like heat-seeking missles and motion-sensing gattling guns. It's a very exciting time for Bell Helicopters."
Apparently the increase in sales is due to the oversaturation of trucks and SUVs for sports-watching males. Today's man wants something with a little more omph, and a little more off-road capability than 4-wheel drive can give. Bell gives them several options such as a double propeller family helicopter that seats a family of 18, with a TV in the back for the kids. Or the always popular convertible sports copter, with an open roof for the feeling of 200 MPH wind rushing through your hair. Nothing impresses the ladies like a copter landing on them with the top down, blowing sand and trash around their faces.
"We are glad people are returning to the Bell Helicopters brand," continued Fulmer. "For too many years we have seen sales tail off to Japanese manufacturers who offer cheaper prices and hybrid powered copters. When you buy a helicopter for your family or you buy your child their first copter when they turn 16, buy American. Our nuclear payload deployment bays are much more reliable than those from overseas. That's the Bell Promise..."
- 10:21 AM ET 12.30
- Share
- Views
- 692
- Comments
- 0
Coming soon: Log in with your Facebook account, send comments and Throwdowns to Facebook and more.
Recent Posts
- ESPN Fires Man Who Accidentally Puts WNBA Headline On Site
- David Blaine To Try To Survive Entire Season As Lions Fan
- Lucky No Good Piece Of **** **** Impregnates Second Model
- Kobe Bryant Proves He Can Win Championship Without Rick Fox
- Management Fire All Nationals Players, Keep Coaches
- MLB Network To Show NFL Preseason Games To Boost Ratings
Web's Best Blogs
-
The Sports Hernia
David Wright spotted moments after leaving the offices of Dr. Tim Whatley
-
The Big Lead
Tiger Has Competition, and Thy Name is Padraig
Tiger briefly lost the lead on the back nine today at Hazeltine. He hasnt gone all Frank…
-
Pro Football Talk
Poppinga On Roster Bubble?
The generous contract Packers linebacker Brady Poppinga signed last offseason could put his roster…
Stub Hub
The 2009 schedule has been released. Search for tickets!
Truth & Rumors
MOST POPULAR
-
1
Meeting with fans backfires on Browns owner
- Views
- 21280
- Comments
- 847
-
2
Canseco wants to fight A-Rod
- Views
- 33492
- Comments
- 197
-
3
Yankees ace recruiting LeBron to Knicks
- Views
- 17323
- Comments
- 78
-
4
Can Red Sox re-sign Bay?
- Views
- 5730
- Comments
- 70
-
5
Brady denies influencing officials
- Views
- 5344
- Comments
- 62
Most Active Users
Comments + Blog Posts + Throwdowns
Message Boards
-
NCAAF > General NCAAF
CFB Game Day 11/7/2009
- Views
- 273
- Replies
- 105
-
NCAAF > General NCAAF
Rivalries/hated teams
- Views
- 251
- Replies
- 30
-
NFL > General NFL
Ok, who would you consider to…
- Views
- 196
- Replies
- 45


Melissa Haro
Esti Ginzberg

Comments (0) Add A Comment
Comment
Remember to keep your posts clean. Profanity will get filtered, and offensive comments will be removed.