Jay Cutler Insulted By Text Message From Broncos Coach | The Sports Comedian - SportsComedian.com

Reports surfaced out of Denver today that Jay Cutler and head coach Josh McDaniels have been exchanging text messages in hopes of patching up their relationship, which has grown increasingly rocky over the offseason. It was hoped that Cutler would return to Denver for voluntary workouts, but it appears that even the texting has rubbed Cutler the wrong way.

"Look, I really wanted to be a part of this team over the offseason, I really did," said Cutler. "We had a nice dialogue going, I started off by saying 'Hey m8! Wat r u up 2?' and he responded with an incredibly insulting 'ROFL, MBFYMADS!'. Now, everyone knows that means, 'Rolling on floor laughing, Mrs. Butterworth **** Your Mom All Day Sunday'. Why would he say something like that to me, and laugh about it?! Mrs. Butterworth is a delicious syrup shaped like a woman, how dare he deface her like this!"

In response to this insult, Cutler said he is going to sell another 2-3 houses and forgo another couple hundred thousand dollars in bonus money to further punish the team.

McDaniels responded by saying the whole thing was a big mixup, and he blames the translator he brought in to help him talk to the young man. Maria Young, a linguist who speaks multiple languages including fluent drunk ****, hipster jagoff, and narcissistic **** quarterback, was the one responsible. She has helped teams communicate in the past with people such as Brett Favre and Ryan Leaf. But this time she thought she was texting an abbreviation that meant "My best friend, you're missing a dope scrimmage'.

McDaniels has since let go the translator, and cited the difficulty in relating to a 25-year-old detached white kid though text abbreviations for the misunderstanding. He said all communication with Cutler will now be handled by his 11-year-old daughter.

SportsComedian.com
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March 31, 2009 03:19 PM ET

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Good stuff man!

MrMiyagiJr

Total Comments (2662)

March 31, 2009 10:28 PM ET

I think we need a new owner and a new coach. this guys ego is so frickin big, he doesn't realize he isn't belicrap. but he has brought the same attitude as his ex-cheating team. Bowlen has lost his marbles. Ego, attitude and but###e. I think they should run them both out. Sell the team and maybe we can get an spend to spend couple hundred dollars a year going to games and such. I won't anymore. Send this team to LA. We need an expansion team. Cutler is going to haunt you in the future you Idiots!!!!

Rudedog

Fort Collins , CO

Total Comments (39)

March 31, 2009 10:31 PM ET

I think we need a new owner and a new coach. this guys ego is so frickin big, he doesn't realize he isn't belicrap. but he has brought the same attitude as his ex-cheating team. Bowlen has lost his marbles. Ego, attitude and but###e. I think they should run them both out. Sell the team and maybe we can get an expansion team. I used to spend couple hundred dollars a year going to games and such. I won't anymore. Send this team to LA. We need an expansion team. Cutler is going to haunt you in the future you Idiots!!!!

Sorry, pc acting up! had to correct.