San Jose Sharks General Manager Doug Wilson today announced that because of issues related to the team's performance in this spring's playoffs & their inability to improve the team, the Sharks will not compete in the 2009-2010 NHL season. "We were a tough studly team during the season & played like little girl's in the playoffs" Wilson said. The team's offseason has been full of wild trade rumors & overall ineptitude. The much discussed Dany Heatley trade never materialized, probably because Ottawa wasn't interested in Jonathan Cheechoo, instead demanding tv announcer Drew Remenda as being worth more.
Unknown to bay area fans was Wilson's failed attempt to trade Jody Shelley & Marcel Goc for Sidney Crosby. Wilson claims it would have helped the Pens money situation "but they just couldn't see the benefit". On the other hand, he also tried to trade Captain Patrick Marleau for Phoenix's Zamboni driver & thought maybe coach Wayne Gretzky could come along as a fourth line center. However the signing of lots of tough guys continues. Triple H & Kurt Angle have been approached. (Angle's stalking his girlfriend might derail that).


Ariel Meredith
Hilary Rhoda



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