Breaking news sports world, reporting from bellagio hotel/casino in Las Vegan,NV. The Cincinatti Bengals and the Portland Trailblazers are in Cahoots and trying to steal money out of the Tropicana Casino in Atlantic City,NJ. Eyewitness Stuart Scott states, "I was just sitting,betting on who is more annyoing me or Steven.A.Smith when all of a sudden Deltcha O'Neil comes in and puts a bag over my head and throws me in a closet. I then hear Steven.A.Smith screaming for Chris Henry to get off him." It was then reported the 2 annoying reporters were found just 10 minutes later by a person who chooses to hide his name from the public. The damage was already delt to the casino. The Vault was already broken into, and as dumb as anything they leave Cincinatti Bengals jerseys all over the scene. Another eyewitness Sebastian Telfair recalls another part of their plot,"I then saw the Portland Trailblazers bus pull into the casino parking lot and the bengals all piled into the vehicle. I then took out my v8 Sniper Rifle and started shooting at them." After that statement Sebastian was then put into jail for Attempted Murder. Luckily we found another non-criminal eyewittness Kobe Bryant. "I was driving in my H3 Hummer and all of a sudden i get crashed into and am pu......pu.......*starts to cry*, i am sorry i just get so emo....emo....*once again starts crying*." Well didn't get much out of him, but anyways. The Trailblazzer and Bengals are now moving into Las Vegas, what a surprise, and trying to steal from another unknown casino. If you have any other info on this criminal act call 555-brea-king-news. Now from the Bellagio Hotel/Casino in Las Vegas,NV this is Adam...."Get yo muther-**** **** over here McFadden."....Oh **** it's them. Signing off this is Adam McFadden good night.....**** RUN FOR YOUR LIFE EVERYBODY!(YOU SEE THE BENGALS AND TRAILBLAZZERS CHASE AFTER MCFADDEN)