Guess who's back, back again, Bovine's back, tell a friend, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back ...

Mooo.  Mooo.  Back in the barnyard, yo.  Time to let the milk flow.

             Baseball Bull#@!*

Nothing makes The Cow happier than enjoying the great confluence, the event that combined it all, baseball, the motion picture, and a bovine theme:  Bull Durham.  Just re-watched it, and The Cow must say, it just gets better with age. 

"Man that ball got outta here in a hurry. I mean anything travels that far oughta have a damn stewardess on it, don't you think?"-Crash Davis

Interesting movie fact.  Crash Davis is portrayed as breaking the all-time minor league home run mark when he hits #227.  The actual record is held by Hector Espino, who blasted 484 moo-nshots in the Mexican League between 1960 and 1984.  Even if you cut out the Mexican League, Crash's number would not even land him in the top 10.

          Continue the Journey, Bernie

Ever the contrarion, The Cow just doesn't get all these self-righteous melodramatic calls for Bernie Williams to hang it up and call it a cowreer.  The Cow thinks ballplayers should just play and play and play, until the cops have to drag them off the field.  The Cow looks forward every year to a return of Rickey Henderson; heck, The Cow hasn't given up totally on Steve Carlton, yet.  The Cow knew someone who lived on Fred McGriff's street in Tampa.  During the offseason, McGriff was seen for hours each day in his "hitting house" whacking balls off a pitching machine.  When asked why he worked so hard, he responded, "as long as they keep paying me $7 million a year to do this, I'll keep working."

They're ballplayers.  It's what they do.  Leave them be.

Bernie, lay down that boogie and play that funky music 'till you die.

  Don't Need A Weatherman to Know What the Forecast Is

Big, thrilling week out at the farm.  The Cow's copy of The 2007 Baseball Forecaster arrived in the mail.  Like "Truck Day" in Boston, the Forecaster signifies the end of the long, brutal South Florida winter, the turning of the aspens (or something), and the true kick-off of the rotisserie baseball season.  The Forecaster is delivered in a pod from the future, and accurately prognosticates the exact stats for the upcoming season.  Red Sox Nation will be happy to know that Big Papi is going 50-138-.311 this season, and that Dice Clay is headed for 15-7, 3.46, 1.17.  Fans of bat-throwing miscreants will marvel at the line Delmon Young is slated for: 17-79-24-.288.  The Forecaster even informs us that Nook Logan will tally 1-12-13-.236, and the irrepresible Pat Neshek will come in at 5-2, 3.41, 1.22.  The Forecaster knows all.  The Forecaster tells all.

           Troy O'Leary Fun Fact #4

No edition of Udderances is complete without The Cow tipping in homage to TO'LC's patron saint.  According to SABR salary analyst Doug Pappas, between 1995-2003, The Great One earned a total of $16,715,000.  Invested conservatively, this should keep Troy out of trouble, and still leave him enough to donate here for technical site support.

          Milkelaneous

The pasture is boring, leaving The Cow plenty of time for internet surfing.  Here are the blogs The Cow reads and recommends, a bovine blogroll, if you will: