Needless to say, I was terrible in week one. All of my upsets (Tampa, Buffalo) didn't pan out, so that means the upsets happened against me.
Last week: 8-8
New Orleans 24 Tampa Bay 17-After the Bucs betrayed me last week, I can't go with them. The Saints will bounce back. They won't face a team as good as the Colts for years.
Green Bay 31 NY Giants 16-The Giants won't have Eli Manning (most likely), even though some might think that will make them better, it won't. No, Jared Lorenzon did not eat him. I joke because I love, Jared. He separated his shoulder.
San Francisco 24 St. Louis 17-The two sexy picks this year looked more like Jared Lorenzon than Jessica Alba. St. Louis got blown out by Carolina, and San Francisco snuck past Arizona. But San Fran got the win. St. Louis can't say that.
Jacksonville 17 Atlanta 0-Shutout time! The Jags gave up 14 points and lost. They had to face the Tennessee Vince Young, but now they get Atlanta. I say that is a good way to bounce back.
Indianapolis 37 Tennessee 13-The best team since the 1985 Bears will once again destroy an overrated team. Chris Brown got lucky. Everyone has that game. Let's see how he responds when he meets Bob Sanders. BAM!
Cincinnati 31 Cleveland 10-The Browns will score a touchdown if they put Quinn in. If they don't, there could be a shutout. With how bad Cincinnati's D is, that is saying something.
Buffalo 27 Pittsburgh 21-The Bills will win this one for Everett. The Steelers got an easy win last week, but what will happen when they face an NFL team?
Houston 21 Carolina 17-The Texans surprised me. They may actually win 8 games this year! The Panthers will be overrated because of their win over the Rams. Sean Salisbury is probably already worshipping a picture of Steve Smith.
Detroit 27 Minnesota 10-The NFC North always provides us with the great matchups. Ugh.
Dallas 28 Miami 10-How about we put Miami, Minnesota, Detroit, Oakland, Atlanta, Kansas City, and Cleveland in a minor league system! Then I wouldn't have to pick the obvious.
Seattle 17 Arizona 10-I hate the Cardinals' line. They have some talent in Levi Brown, but that's it. Lofa Tatupu (you never get tired saying or writing that) will destroy Edgerrin. Edgerrin won't care. He's just in it for the money.
Chicago 21 Kansas City 0-Even though Grossman is an incompetent scrub, the Chiefs won't win with 0 points.
Denver 31 Oakland 10-It looks like the Oakland defense has suddenly started to suck. I wonder who the head coach will be next year?
Baltimore 16 NY Jets 10-Maybe Baltimore cheats. It's hard to explain why this D is so good. Mangini will probably call foul.
San Diego 21 New England 17-Let's see how much cheating helps the Patsies.
Philadelphia 28 Washington 20-I will start a petition to keep NFC East games off of national TV. Who's with me?
Expect 16-0. It's probably gonna happen.