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Josh
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For Herm and Norv every day is a no-brainer.

As the tagline for this game states, we’re dealing with 2 coaches that are on the shallow end of the intelligence pool.  But hey, they do get to spend their days coaching football…which is way better than what we do… 

Y-you'll have to excuse my friend. He's a little slow...

You’re right Dan, sitting on our rears, wasting time on the internet, and haggling about football does beat the pressure packed daily life of an NFL coach.  Okay…can we get paid like them then?  No?  Not even if we put in a full 40 hours a week? Fine then…we’ll just keep doing what we’re doing then. 

Let’s quit the rambling and get to the debate….

Dan:

So, Chargers-Chiefs... 

All signs point to both teams losing.  But I think the signs are stronger against the Chargers.

I have become convinced that one huge factor in what separates a good head coach from a bad head coach is 2nd half performance.  Herm Edwards and Norv Turner, by that standard, are BAD head coaches. 

Kansas City is on a four game losing streak.  In each game, they were leading at halftime.  Some of the games weren't even close by the end. 

San Diego has been alternating wins and losses, and they seem to either win big or lose big.  If they don't get off to a great start and put some points up on the board fast, they're screwed, because they're useless in the second half.  They've held every opponent they've beaten to one first-half score.  Only the Bears kept the Chargers from scoring multiple times, and that was back in week 1.  In the past five victories, the Chargers held the lead at halftime, and most were comfortable leads.   

So what conclusion can we draw from that?  I have no idea.  I just find it interesting.  And it's pretty safe to say the second half will be a stinker.

San Diego has only won one game on the road this year; that huge win over Denver.  But Kansas City has only won two home games, against Cincinnati and Minnesota; so again, we can expect both teams to lose. 

All right, it probably feels like I'm just jerking you around.  That's because I am.  I haven't made a single point yet.  Which is probably how the second half of the game will feel.

Here's an actual argument.  Herm Edwards is a better coach.  If this game is close at halftime, which I think it will be, Norv is almost guaranteed to blow it.  

Also, you're looking at Brodie Croyle, Kolby Smith, and Dwayne Bowe as your leaders on the field.  The words "nothing to lose" comes to mind - the team is now in future mode and they'll have a mindset where getting over dumb mistakes will be easier.  The Chargers' mistakes (which they'll make plenty of) will eat at them, and they'll get frustrated, and they'll make more.

Its 1-6 on the road for the Chargers come Sunday. 

Josh:

Sitting here, looking over the complete tripe you just wrote...the thoughts that kept running around my head were...

"So we both agree these coaches are horrible" 

"Both these teams should lose"

"Just when I thought you couldn't get any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!" 

And then it hit me...we're simply arguing about which of these 2 bozos are dumber.  Well, Norv is Dumb, but Herm is Dumber.

Let's take a quick look at the Chiefs body of work at home.  In 1 game...1...they have scored more than 20 points...in the other 4?  17 or less.  They average 15 points a game at home...and if you remove the one statistical anomaly?  12 points.  For whatever reason, this offense is just awful at home...they'd be better off just taking a road trip to Aspen...A place where the beer flows like wine. Where beautiful women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano.  

But, alas, they are at home.

This might be the only time you can say "Herm Edwards is a better coach" and I won't shoot milk out my nose.  But then again, Herm could walk up to Norv and say "Man, you are one pathetic loser. No offense." And Norv would just shake his hand and thank him.  

The rule I live by, and the one that is called into play here is simple...when coaching is equal...go with the team with more talent.  That's the Chargers.  Yes, the Chiefs have the young guys out there...but the Chargers are playing for the division crown...and once you get to the playoffs anything could happen...even a Super Bowl.  The chances might be one in a million...

But I'm telling you there's a chance. 

Dan:

I'm flattered, but that tripe was nowhere near complete.

You're right, the Chargers have more to play for.  That's exactly why they'll lose.  Nobody in the AFC West can handle the pressure - the division is there for the taking, but none of them can figure out how to put a winning streak together.  Life in the AFC West is a fragile thing; one minute you're eating a burger, the next you're dead meat.  

You've done this "how many points they're averaging on the road" thing before... so let's dive deeper.  You're not looking at the defenses.  The Chargers are giving up 32 points per game on the road (removing the statistical anomaly of the Denver game, it's only fair); the Chiefs are giving up about 21.  So if you average what the Chiefs typically score at home with what the Chargers typically allow, and vice versa, you get a final score of Chargers 19.5, Chiefs 22.

This is the time of year where Kansas City somehow always finds a way to turn it on and make a run at the playoffs.  So they backtracked a tad!  They're in a hole, and they're just going to have to dig themselves out.   

And if you think the Chargers have even the slightest chance of getting anywhere in the playoffs, I say you've mated a bulldog with a Shih Tzu.

Josh:

Oh...I just got that...I said "complete tripe" and then you said "that tripe was nowhere near complete"...that's clever.  Sort of flip the tripe over on me...its puddling in my lap...I see how you are...frickin' tripe spiller...come in here, spillin' tripe in a guy's lap, and you don't even have the decency to offer to wipe it up?  Well you know what I have to say to that?  You can kiss my tripe soaked rear...Both cheeks, both lips, right here!  

What's amusing is you speak of the AFC West as being "dead meat"...but both these teams are members of that dead meat division...so wouldn't that be an argument that could work either way?  But I guess you're right...the Chiefs, although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, can still serve a purpose.  They can play the dead meat under the rear tire of a little team I like to call the Chargers.

While some people just aren't cut out for life on the road, that doesn't apply to the Chargers in this case.  Why you ask?  Look at the teams the Chargers have played on the road...Pats (yeah, they're good)...Pack (good too)...Vikes (AP goes nuts, plus dome)...Jags (Also very good).  Now let's look at the Chiefs again...I'll give you a moment to figure out which team doesn't belong...  

Yep, I was thinking the same thing, that John Denver is full of s**t...the Chiefs are not on par with the rest of those teams.

The likelihood of the Chiefs making the playoffs is equal to the chances of the US landing on the moon...what? 

WE LANDED ON THE MOON!! That's Great!!

So, let me change that....the Chiefs getting into the playoffs...well...statistically, they say you're more likely to get killed on the way to the airport. You know, like on a head on crash or flying off a cliff or getting trapped under a gas truck! That's the worst! I have this cousin, well y'know, I had this cousin...  

Well you get the picture...

Dan:

Ah, but the Chargers didn't just lose to four good teams on the road; they didn't come anywhere close to beating four good teams on the road.  Well, **** sideways, I guess that would mean the Chargers are NOT a good team.   

Look, the premise of my whole argument is that the AFC West is screwy and the Chargers, though they have no business losing, will find a way, seeing as how they're pretty awful.  So you can throw all the logic you want at me, but it's no good against my argument.  Unless you have some way of making sense of the nonsense that has happened in this division this year--they're 2-10 against the NFC North!!!--you can't possibly hope to convince me that anything expected will ever happen in this division again. 

This isn't a situation where you can see someone carrying a luggage and airplane tickets and surmise that they're flying somewhere; a safer assumption is that they're on their way to the medical school to give a lecture in 20 minutes.  Or that their head is about to fall off, who knows?  

Seattle was smart to get out of this division.  To someplace where the beer flows like wine. Where beautiful women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano.  Of course they went to a similarly weird division, but they manage to stay on top of it somehow.

There you go, sucker of big, brown, dirty eggs.   

Josh:

First off, I'm calling a party foul....already used the "beer flow like win..." quote, so you are docked 800 points and you have to drink.  Besides, the French are a**h***s.

Second...you're saying in this division, expect the unexpected... 

So would the unexpected be that a team that can't put a winning streak together does?  Or that this division becomes momentarily sane?  When one begins to expect and predict the un-expectable...that's usually the time when reality kicks into gear, and kicks you in the teeth.  Don't worry Dan, just find a happy place...find a happy place...

You're right, they are 2-10 against the NFC North (thanks for that gift AFC West)...but last I checked, they're not playing the NFC North this week.  Why in god's name would you think they are playing the North?  You are one pathetic loser!  

This game is simple...imagine for a second we're in the Rockies...you're freezing...and I simply turn to you and say...

"Here, maybe you should have this extra pair of gloves... my hands are getting kinda sweaty!" 

In this example, I'm the Chargers...we're both in the freezing cold (bad coaching)...but I've got extra gloves (more talent).  In the NFL, that's all that matters my friend...that's all that matters.

But then again, in the AFC West, you could be in week 13 and feel like you've driven only 4 inches.

Who knows; what I do know?  I got worms.

-----

And there you have it folks, another Friday Debate in the books.  Remember to tip your waitress on the way out, and if you’d like a copy of tonight’s soundtrack you can find them in the lobby.  But before you go, let me leave you with one final thought…a perfect summary of this game…

What the one doesn't have, the other is missing.

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