Destroy Your Opponent
The Center for Opponent Neutralization and Tonda Harding presents.......
Are you tired of losing in softball to that same team every year? The one with all the sluggers year in and year out? Are you tired of losing at tennis 6-0, 6-0 to the dude with the killer serve? Have you had enough of that Buddy that always shoots in the low 80s against you? Or perhaps you're just tired of losing to people better than you? We can help.
Yes that's right. For a small fee. we at the Tonya Harding Center for Opponent Neutralization (C.O.N.) can maim, dismember, paralyze, or even kill the S.O.B that's blocking your path to athletic success.
Check our price list:
Blow to the knee...................................................................................$99.95
Blow to both knees (a better buy)............................................................$149.95
Blow to the head...................................................................................$124.95
Knife in the back (great for tennis players)...................................................$49.95
Kick in the groin (men only)........................................................................$9.95
Poking out the eyes (three stooges style).....................................................$89.95
Gunshot to the head................................................................................$499.95
Impalement in a public place......................................................................$999.95
Prices subject to change without notice
Wednesday is bonus day. Order one act of violence and receive another of equal or lesser value at 50% off.
With every order over $300.00 you will receive a collapsible hard plastic baton personally signed by Tonya herself-just like the one used to screw up Nancy Kerrigan.
To Order, dial toll-free 1-800-Just-win
Shanon Lersh
Kim Cloutier
Did You See That?
College Football Top 25 Review
Comments (9) Add A Comment
So this means I can't make any jokes when Ohio State beats USC next year...
Escobar Caesar
Youngstown, OH
Total Comments (19540)
Ohio State has conveniently scheduled SC after they feel the threat is gone-- and they will still lose. They make it a point to not play anyone, so you know they are counting on a win.
Hllywd: Old…
Columbus , OH
Total Comments (7947)
Poking out the eyes (three stooges style).....................................................$89.95
Hi, I'm Vince Wilfork.
thehemogoblin
The University Of, OR
Total Comments (29343)
Just curious...AGAIN!
Why was this blog sent to me?
USC will be better next year and OSU will not even come close.
Knight Sport
Sparks , NV
Total Comments (89)
Love it, unless it is used on my players. You should make a good living off of your new business. Could you get Tanya's autograph for me. Oh, and is Jeff Gilooly (*sp ) single these days.
Dallas Clark- SB in…
Total Comments (1344)
Funny.Oh yeah,O-H-I-O!
(Cincy)
Jamestown, OH
Total Comments (10951)
Having fun........priceless. LOL
Denis24
Total Comments (2679)
HAHAHAHA
that was funny...LOLOL
Love the Wilfork one..
Im a Pats fan and I say again, what a JERK.
Who other than a playground bully behaves like that?
Im betting he's leaving the Pats soon.
No way does Kraft or Belichick put up with that. When Seymour pulled his crap, Belichick pulled him off the field. Sat him out.
Wilfork was stupid for that. Just plain ignorant and stupid.
KPKahder -
Total Comments (45280)
Oh yeah, btw, is this for sports only?
can you meet me at the courthouse at 9 Friday morning?
do a meet and greet to my ex?????
KIDDING !
KPKahder -
Total Comments (45280)
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