Chief, massaging his tanned round chin with his large right hand. 'Hmmmmmm. Believe Indian also have fable about that same thing-um. Maybe scientists stole original idea from Native American?'
Walt: 'I wouldn't be at all surprised at that. We've ripped you guys off pretty badly... and Chief, if we're all about to go, I just want you to know that has always bothered me, and also that you have been the best-um friend-em I ever had-im...'
They hug and shed a tear....feeling that the end is near.
Chief, brightening a bit: 'But, if on sea, maybe survive-um?'
Walt, shakes his head resolutely, 'No... They're sure about this whole thing. They say when the Earth sinks, all the boats out on the seas will sink at the same time...'
Chief: 'Hold it-um, Walt my friend....That make-um no sense. You mean we will suddenly become too heavy for the boat-em?'
Walt: 'No, the seas will rise from the simultaneous sinking of all the continents at a rate that will create a tidal wave 1,000 feet tall. Chief, this is a great ship that Handsome Bob Hansom, formerly of Handsome Bob Hansom's Handsome Bob Hansom Handsome Auto Parts and Service built for us.... But no ship can compete with a 1,000 feet tidal wave.'
Chief, walking over to the railing, looking down at the churning seawater of the Intercontinental Ocean, as the powerful sea cruiser cuts through it like butter through a knife...
Walt, alarmed, when he sees where the Chief is headed in his upset state.... 'Handsome Bob... Wakeup... Wakeup!!'
Handsome Bob keeps snoring. But Archie the homeless guy happens by Walt just at this minute: 'Hey, you dxckhead! Are you lookin' for someone to steer this fxckin bucket of bolts whiles you consolo mio the Injun man??'
Walt would never normally let anyone but himself or Bob pilot the ship, but....'Just keep the steering wheel pointed right where it is now. See down here? This here is the brake peddle.... and this is the clutch....but you shouldn't need that, so forget I told you that... The turn signals are on the steering wheel, as normal....'
'Aye, aye, cap'n!!' Archie says, beaming, taking over the captain's role with great pride and satisfaction.
Walt turns back to where the Chief is.... but he's -- he's - he's -he's go-go-go-gon-gone!!!
'Over here, Walt-um,' the Chief says in his deep, rich, baritone voice. 'Over here, by the rack with all the deepsea fishing gear-em...'
'OTG!!' Walt cries....Hurrying over, around the passenger viewing bridge, to the side of the boat where the rack with all the deepsea fishing gear-em is...'
But when he gets there, no Chief-um. Plus, he is beginning to become seasick -- something that almost never happens to Walt, from the erratic way that homeless man Archie is steering the ship first left, and then sharply right, and then sharply left, and then right -- and then right again!! What is he doing????
Walt: 'Chief: Where are you, for gosh sakes?'
Chief, his voice muffled: 'Over here, Cap'n, inside passenger viewing bridge-um ... The way Arch-em steers ship, Chief needed to sit down, put head between leg.'
Walt: 'Good idear, Chief.... I comin' to join yuz.... Assuming I don't have to stop and get sick-em along the way...'
Walt staggers into the enclosed passenger viewing bridge... The name is somewhat misleading....It is NOT the passenger scenic bridge, which is just aft of it. Rather, the passenger viewing bridge is a place where the captain can view what is happening via hidden cameras in every portion of the ship. The crew calls it the 'passenger viewing bridge' because when off duty, they like to practice surveillance on the rooms which contain attractive female passengers....
Chief-um, his eyes shut: 'Walt-em, Chief must keep-em eyes closed because of things not right for chief to see going on in rooms....'
Walt, keeping his eyes open once he's sure Chief's are shut: 'Yes, I know just what you mean, Chief. There are certain private things that you and I aren't meant to see...'
His stomach in his throat, Captain Walt woozilly notes that Handsome Bob has been awakened by Archie's 'wild steering' of the boat, and is now coming to 'relieve him from duty'. He notes when he glances at the passenger viewing display that practically all of the passengers are in the midst of being ill.
Walt shakes his head in disbelief. This whole excursion into the dimensional rift has turned into a nightmare... He should have paid closer attention to the omens when the ship departed on the voyage... The stormy sky opening above the ship at the dock, a sickly opalescent oval that began disbursing tremendously powerful bolts of lightning.... One striking a nearby ship that was twice the size of theirs, and blowing it to splintereens.... Then, worse yet, the lightning striking and hitting the huge, hundred foot tall concrete dinosaur that helped attract paying visitors to the Pinch & Putt Miniature Golf Course for Lovers Only... Yes, hitting the dinosaur a number of times, including a bolt that bounced off the obstacle on the 18th hole and hit the huge monster right in his anxs!! This was the final straw, and the dinosaur came to life -- saw Walt's ocean cruiser at the dock, ready to embark on its journey, and immediately and mistakenly assumed that it was the source of the embarrassing and extremely painful jolt.
The concrete dinosaur therefore made its charge, running like a house afire. Well, perhaps that's not the best simile, but you get the idea, maybe.
But young. athletic, hunky, not-real-smart-but-practical Handsome Bob rushed to get everyone situated and then rushed back to the control bridge and had the cruiser shooting out of the dock towards the heart of the Intercontinental Ocean just in time... as the Dinosaur stood there in several feet of water, shaking its huge head and shaking its clawed fist.
Walt opens his eyes to find himself alone in the passenger viewing bridge....Hey what's that going on on Berth 23A....All that naked...He shuts off the passenger room displays and curses himself for even glancing: 'Chief: Where are you, for gosh sakes?'
'Over here, Walt-um,' the Chief says in his deep, rich, baritone voice. 'Over here, by the rack with all the miniature golf equipment, for the on-board miniature golf course...'
Handsome Bob as he steers the boat on a course designed to avoid the bouncing and twisting that has made practically everyone on board sick: 'He just moved again, Walt, he's back over by the rack with all the deepsea fishing gear-em where he was before... But why don't you come and relieve me, Boss, at the wheel, so I can go check on the welfare of all our passengers, especially the young ladies, who usually have the most squeamish stomachs...'
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