• 04:57 PM ET  09.05
Starting last week and continuing all season, The College Football Tour Guide will be spending his Saturday's tailgating at some of the nation's biggest schools -- and filming his adventures. The first stop was in Athens, where Dan tried to figure out what makes UGA fans tick. He also filed some notes from the road:
• This is probably an understood fact, but Georgia girls are really good looking. My cameraman, Esa, and I couldn’t find parking around campus for about 45 minutes because there was just too much to see. I only know Pac-10 football environments, and walking around amongst thousands of girls in tiny, vaguely-proper sundresses made for one of the 10 best Saturdays I’ve had in my life. Before I immediately get myself into trouble and paint myself as a wandering perv (most likely not true), I’ll just move on to the next bullet point.
• When we got out of our sweet toothpaste-colored rental car, Esa immediately declared that he guessed that he’d have four buttons open in his disgustingly and instantly sweaty shirt by kickoff. You’ll be relieved to know that I, along with the rest of Athens, only had to deal with two buttons. The point is that it was humid and sticky enough for us to consider starting a franchise of stores throughout the South that exclusively sells fine Gold Bond products.
• Somehow, game day parking was free in one of the parking structures on campus. As you can see, I’m very easily impressed by parking conveniences. That’s what happens when you live in LA your entire life.
• People tailgate on train tracks that run through campus. I’m almost positive that the tracks are inactive or that no trains run on game day, but I still found it to be pretty ballsy to set up a tent on some train tracks.
• There’s a Poultry Science building on the Georgia campus. Yep. I walked by this building a good six times before stopping, rereading the sign a couple times, and thinking, “Wait, what?” I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think about that building’s occupants a few hours later at a Chick Fil-A between Athens and Atlanta. Oh well.
• I had at least three people that had to be older than 60 tell me their favorite places to get hammered in downtown Athens after the game. I’m not sure if this is awesome or deeply troubling.
• I asked a girl I interviewed if she had a boyfriend who would be upset that my arm was around her during the interview. She said, “Well there is a boy over there, but he’s kind of a****.” I met the guy and he seemed nice enough, but it was easily the line of the day.
• I didn’t get to see Uga in person, but I did get to see a truck carrying around a giant 8 foot inflatable version of Uga that some guys were willing to rent out for the day, so it’s pretty much the same thing. 
• I spent nearly every timeout and break in the game texting buddies about how Georgia girls make every other school’s girls pale in comparison. To be fair, though I anticipate sending out identical messages nearly every week this fall. Really, I swear I’m not just a wandering perv.


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