Though I didn't see it (thanks, NBC), I hear that Usain Bolt looked awesome in running a 19.30 to win the Olympic 200, breaking Michael Johnson's epic world record of 19.32 set during the 1996 Atlanta Games. That makes Bolt not only the first man since Carl Lewis to sweep the 100 and 200 at the same Games, but the first ever to win both in world-record times.
In other words, Bolt is pretty fast. But as Gene Rayburn might wonder: How fast is he?
We set out to answer that in true Match Game fashion:
10. He's so fast, he can outrun the Beijing smog
9. He's so fast, he doesn't give incompetent Olympic judges time to screw him
8. He's so fast, he's literally invisible to American viewers until 13 hours after he finishes
7. He's so fast, he can finish a Michael Phelps breakfast while you're still tucking in your napkin
6. He's so fast, he hit age 16 quicker than a Chinese gymnast
5. He's so fast, he can run 50 meters before Bela Karolyi spits out a single "reep-off!"
4. He's so fast, he makes the Redeem Team look like it's running the "slow break"
3. He's so fast, Bill Clinton's taking notes
2. He's so fast, he calculated gymnastics' uneven bars tiebreaker in his head before the computer
1. He's so fast, he made America's supposed sprint dominance disappear