Here are some morsels to nibble as you hustle off to watch Justin Timberlake's PGA Tour event:
• The Phillies beat the Dodgers 5-1 last night to advance first to their first World Series since 1993. Philadelphia took a quick 5-0 lead and the only real drama after that was whether Manny Ramirez would suddenly stop trying to force a trade to the Phils.
• The Rays will start Scott Kazmir tonight against the Red Sox with a chance to wrap up the ALCS in five games. In a related story, Mets fans will start crying anew about Victor Zambrano.
• In a potentially ominous omen, the famous Citgo sign over Fenway Park’s Green Monster was damaged yesterday in a small electrical fire. Authorities suspect a jealous Joe The Electrician.
• Roger Clemens says he lacks the desire to play again because he’s enjoying his life of leisure. In fact, he already has golf receipts for the next nine months.
• Chiefs TE Tony Gonzalez held a players-only meeting with his teammates yesterday to assure them he’s not bitter that he wasn’t traded to a contender. Instead, he’s bitter simply because he’s still on the Chiefs.
• The Blackhawks have fired coach Denis Savard after just four games. The team felt it couldn’t wait any longer after watching the Cubs’ entire season go down the drain in a mere three games.
• Trinidad and Tobago beat the U.S. 2-1 yesterday in a World Cup qualifier. Alas the game was missed by national hero Jean-Paul Jean-Paul, who overslept.