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  • 09/13/2011, 06:44PM ET

Let's call it a lover's quarrel

CuntryBlumpkin (305-247-64) vs cbook (5-1-0)
5
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The argument is Tim Tebow>Joe Flacco.

Let me ask you a simple question.

Has Joe FLacco found Jesus? Has he opened his heart to the man who sacrificed himself for our sins? Has Joe Flacco done missionary work in the name of the Good Lord? Can Joe Flacco calm a storm and heal the blind? Did Joe Flacco save himself for marriage?

And if Joe Flacco were a third stringer, would he still lead his team in jersey sales?

I didn't think so.

The fact of the matter is Tim Tebow is a saint among men, while Joe Flacco is a sin filled heretic. I don't know about you but a holy man such as Tebow will always be ranked higher than a heathen like Flacco who chooses to associate himself with questionable charcters and murderers who paid his way out of a serious charge.

Tebow is the savior that the NFL has been waiting on. In world full evil forces and bad infulences, Tebow has stolen the hearts of millions by keeping it clean and sincerely thanking the almighty creator for all of the blessing that has fell upon him.

Tebow's faith will not go unrewarded.


Wait, so, are you saying that we're lovers, or Tebow and Flacco are lovers?

I am not sure if cool Joe found Jesus, but he did find his O line and that is nothing to shake a stick at. We've only been waiting for how long? Meanwhile, your chosen one has found... a place on the bench.

Next, please provide a link to where Tebow calmed the storm and healed the blind. I'm having trouble finding it in my bible-macbook.

And who cares about Jersey sales? When Favre signed with the Jets, that was the number one selling jersey and look how long that lasted! About as long as my McNair Ravens jersey (may he rest in peace).

Here are a few things that are greater than Brother Tebow:

Rude's appetite, WWJ's affinity for using italics, MMT's bowel movements, Pchy and Dj's TD record, El D/SXM/Confucius/and Justin Cyders sarcasm (really, it can be a bit much), ****'s ****, Twins' custom shoe collection, Grue's awesomeness, Yoda's youtube videos, Baron's GB homerism, Tom Brady getting me 48 points last night, Ron Artest's new name, that buck in your avatar, HBO on demand, bacon and bacon sandwiches, running in the rain, and pissing in the wind.


You can take what you want from the title, but let's just let one thing about be made crystal clear.

If Tim Tebow and Joe Flacco were lovers, Tim Tebow would without a doubt be the man in the relationship, and that isn't even debatable. Proof positive that Tebow>Flacco.

You said some very blasphemous stuff in your argument. I would definitely beg for forgiveness before Tebow sends a plague of frogs to your house. If you think that flea infestation was bad, just wait until you come home to a house full of frogs. It won't be a pretty sight, and you'll get warts getting them out. But the frogs are better than locusts, which is the next step.

It is common knowledge that Tim Tebow calms storms and heals the blind. He can also move mountains, turn the tide, and has been known to turn water into wine, though he would never drink it because he is a man without sin.

Joe Flacco needs to take a hard look at the way his life is going and the bad cases he chooses to associate with, other wise his tongue will fall out, and he'll spend eternity in hell.

Anybody that votes for right's blasphemy is a heretic, and expect UPS to deliver a Bible to your house.


PAUSE.

...

Remind me how Tebow can be a man without sin AND be in a homosexual relationship with Joe Flacco? Your bible seems to be missing a couple chapters out of the old testament! Or maybe my bible just doesn't have the book of Tebow. lolololol

So, if the Lord has chosen Tebow to be the savior of the NFL, then why is he warming the bench??

And now, a chapter out of the FN bible:

FN is the great escape
phony "friends" and sports debates,
bandwagon fans, Yakov banned,
Mods always lend a hand.

Float's humor,
Truth and Rumors,
Jim obsessed with Arnold's tumor.

Roy fakes,
Mondo bakes,
verbal beatings Cain takes.

(Un)'s Eagles strike again,
EZ's grammar on the mend,
Cat is everybody's friend. (also, GG, thank you for being a friend).

Ogre's hair,
Flambo's flair,
Tnerbs freaky eye stare.

Message boards,
TD wh0res,
keep us coming back for more.

Now, as it is written in the book of Flacco:

Joe

A QB you shall be,
I've blessed you with the perfect D.

Hand to Rice and gain some yards,
cause Ricky will not get you far.

Your team is better as a whole,
and going to the Superbowl.

AMEN.

September 13, 2011  06:45 PM ET

You 2 are quarreling about whose lover is better?

September 13, 2011  06:47 PM ET

Jesus.

Wait... that's appropriate for this TD, so...

Nevermind.

September 13, 2011  06:59 PM ET
QUOTE(#1):

You 2 are quarreling about whose lover is better?

Miranda Lambert is not involved in this TD, so leave her out of it.

September 13, 2011  07:02 PM ET
QUOTE(#3):

Miranda Lambert is not involved in this TD, so leave her out of it.

When did Tebow change his name?

September 13, 2011  07:05 PM ET

September 13, 2011  08:25 PM ET
QUOTE(#2):

Jesus.Wait... that's appropriate for this TD, so...Nevermind.

I hope that wasn't meant in vain young lady.

September 13, 2011  09:40 PM ET

I'm gonna have to vote left.

September 13, 2011  09:43 PM ET
QUOTE(#8):

I'm gonna have to vote left.

I'm gonna have to vote right.

September 13, 2011  09:47 PM ET
QUOTE(#9):

I'm gonna have to vote right.

It's not my loss if you choose to burn in hell.

September 13, 2011  09:49 PM ET

Flacco sacrificed the heathens last Sunday. Tebow just grew a neck beard.

September 13, 2011  09:54 PM ET
QUOTE(#10):

It's not my loss if you choose to burn in hell.

Not getting into a religious debate

September 13, 2011  09:54 PM ET
QUOTE(#11):

Flacco sacrificed the heathens last Sunday. Tebow just grew a neck beard.

Fear the Beard!

September 13, 2011  09:55 PM ET
QUOTE(#7):

I hope that wasn't meant in vain young lady.

Aw, you called me young lady. I might have to vote left.

September 13, 2011  09:56 PM ET
QUOTE(#12):

Not getting into a religious debate

I seriously hope that you're not taking this seriously.

September 13, 2011  09:56 PM ET
QUOTE(#14):

Aw, you called me young lady. I might have to vote left.

Part of the plan.

September 13, 2011  09:58 PM ET
QUOTE(#16):

Part of the plan.

Bait and switch, eh?

Vote right.

September 13, 2011  09:59 PM ET
QUOTE(#17):

Bait and switch, eh?Vote right.

You can't be older than 25. If you are, you sure don't look it.

September 13, 2011  10:07 PM ET
QUOTE(#18):

You can't be older than 25. If you are, you sure don't look it.

It's the 9 lives factor. Even though I lost one, the remaining 8 seem to be workin it!

September 13, 2011  10:08 PM ET
QUOTE(#15):

I seriously hope that you're not taking this seriously.

that's my way of saying lightly that hell is for pansies that fall for those lies.

 
September 13, 2011  10:10 PM ET
QUOTE(#21):

that's my way of saying lightly that hell is for pansies that fall for those lies.

I'm not gonna argue religion, but this goes into my theory that atheists are more preachy than Christians.

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