- 05/18/2012, 11:32PM ET
JimJ77 Can't make it up said 05/18, 11:32 PM
Its plain obvious what the answer is here. Anyone who has seen the greatest movie ever made would have to agree. In Predator, after his team was wiped out, Arnie took matters into his own hands and flipped the tables on that murderous Predator. He hunted him down and dropped a tree on his head.
Don't believe me?
The answer of course is Hunting.
You see Arnie is an expert with guns, knives, and hand to hand combat. We've seen him snap necks, carve dudes up, and fire off 10,000 rounds on armies of men.
You're telling me he couldn't smoke Bamby? Haha.
I know most of you rice d icks will say, "well Jim he did that in the movies not in real life." Well I'm here to tell you that the movies he made over the years prepared him to become successful in hunting.
He still needed to learn to defend himself and become an expert in weaponry.
Arnie is also a big strong Austrian, and was born to kill. There is no other sport that he would be as successful in.
Now if you will excuse me I'm cracking off another brew and dancing away.
williewilliejuan said 05/19, 01:27 AM
At first, hunting seems like a good choice. Arnie has made a lot of movies where he handles weapons and he has a well-documented history of stalking and cornering beasts. Unfortunately, that history tells us he's much more likely to sleep with the beast than kill it.
Arnie's also not the most stealthy individual. Maybe it's different in Europe, but here in America, this kind of thing scares off prey.
Arnie's an actor. He may be able to pretend to be a hunter. Hell, he pretended to be attracted to Maria for over 25 years just to further his political goals. However, the one thing he can't pretend to be is something other than a fruity European. Seriously, the guy has been in the US for over 40 years and still only speaks English a little better than alacran.
If there was ever any doubt that Arnie was a fruity European, here he is at the beach:
The only thing that says "fruity European" more than old dudes in banana hammocks is soccer. Arnie would have been a natural at soccer, which I will detail in my next arguments.
JimJ77 Can't make it up said 05/19, 09:10 PM
You're right about one thing. Soccer is for fruity Europeans. Its also for gay men, and Arnie is the antithesis of gay. Say what you want about the Mexicunt, but we've all been hammered and brought home a disgusting pig. It happens.
Arnie has scored so much tang in his life. Does this look like a man who doesn't do well with the ladies? (Arnie with only 9 fingers?)
Arnold played soccer as a skinny kid in Austria, until he realized how dumb it was. Then he took up the sport of bodybuilding. He put on so much bulk, he would be gassed withing 30 seconds on a soccer field. His soccer days were left in Austria.
He came to a real country where soccer is made fun of and the rejects play. He made movies Americans like. Explosions, blood, violence and great acting.
Sorry, had to regain my composure after that unbelievable scene.
And stealth? Its obvious you need to go pick up Predator. Arnie was basically a ninja in those last 20 minutes.
Hunting is the sport Arnie would kick ass in. Americans hunt. Arnie is an American now, no longer a fruity, soccer playing European.
williewilliejuan said 05/20, 01:53 AM
Interesting that the pic you chose to demonstrate Arnie's "manliness" features 4 dudes and only 2 chicks... Anyhoo
As you mentioned, Arnie actually played soccer as a child. Until a recent political disagreement, there was a soccer stadium that bore his name in his native Austria. In 2009, Arnie led the charge to bring the World Cup back to the US, and was quoted as saying "It's the number one sport in the world and the World Cup is the world's number one sporting event. Let's bring it back to the USA." Arnie is and has always been a big fan of soccer.
But let's look a little closer at the demands of soccer and why Arnie would be a natural for the sport:
Running: From his movie The Running Man to his bid for Governor to running from Maria and her attorneys, Arnie is a man on the move.
Sticking a ball in a big opening: We discussed Ms. Baena in the first argument
Flopping: Arnie knows flops. Last Action Hero; Jingle All the Way; Batman and Robin...
Here's Arnie apologizing for his work in the last one:
Keeping your hands to yourself: Well... you can't expect to get them all.
JimJ77 Can't make it up said 05/20, 09:44 PM
Arnie can talk about soccer all he wants, doesn't mean he'd be any good at it. Hell, I watch a crapload of MMA and you won't see me in the cage anytime soon. I'd be eating through a straw for a year.
People get confused about the vid below. This was Arnie's real reaction to soccer, and in no way was he watching 2 girls 1 cup, it was actually 22 soccer players, 1 world cup. He lied to cover up his true feelings about that gay sport.
There you have it. Soccer makes Arnie dry heave. It also makes him hungry for some reason.
Now hunting is where its at. As you've previously stated, Arnie hunted down that beast Mexican and slayed her ass. He has more pelts on his wall than even the Predator.
So we already know he can handle himself in any form of combat, and he has the skill to bag more chicks than Wilt the Stilt.
He's a perfect fit for hunting.
In fact Arnie just came back from a hunt and decided to grill his catch. And its not Delmonico steak, he lied once again. Don't ask why, but I have a lot of footage of Arnie.
Arnie the hunter!!
williewilliejuan said 05/21, 08:27 PM
I'm disappointed in you, Jim. More importantly, Arnie is disappointed in you. Over the years, I have seen you write on many occasions how Arnie is the ultimate alpha male. I have seen you extol his overall excellence at anything he puts his heart and mind to. I have also seen you state on several occasions (including this one) how soccer is a sport for girls and pansies. So, how is it that you are now insinuating that Arnie - the ultimate alpha male - wouldn't be able to succeed at soccer?
So, let me help you out. Arnie wouldn't just excel at soccer - he'd dominate it. Hunting is a sport for real men. Arnie would probably do fine at it, but he would also be compared against real men when determining his greatness. In soccer, he would be competing against...well...soccer players. Are you seriously trying to tell me that Arnie wouldn't destroy a bunch of soccer wimps? Please. He'd own every record in the book.
I'm sure if Arnie is reading this TD, this is how he would feel about your lack of faith in his abilities:
Well, I don't doubt Arnie's ability to succeed in soccer. Not one bit.
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