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Hillis considered the CIA? News to Shurmur

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08:05 AM ET 03.02 | The NBA has its Agent Zero, and the NFL may now have Agent Hillis. Browns coach Pat Shurmur said Thursday that running back Peyton Hillis never told him he was contemplating retiring -- or considering a career in the CIA. ... [According to a Thursday report], Hillis told Browns coaches as recently as the end of the season that he was considering hanging it up and was pondering a CIA career during the season. "Really? That's news to me," said Shurmur at the Greater Cleveland Auto Show at the International Exposition Center in Cleveland. "I'm one of the coaches he didn't tell, obviously." Shurmur said he had frequent discussions with Hillis throughout the season, "and we never discussed any of those topics, for sure. Beyond that, I really can't comment."

The Plain Dealer

Peyton Hillis, Getty Images Peyton Hillis, Getty Images
March 2, 2012  08:14 AM ET

I don't get what these athletes think sometimes... you don't just join the CIA (or in Tiger Woods case the Navy SEALS). They have very stringent standards, now I can understand if Hillis had said he would have applied to the CIA, but its far from a foregone conclusion that he would have gotten a job there. As for Tiger, no chance sorry, not only is becoming a SEAL one of the hardest things to do, but no way the Navy would let Woods be put in harms way, if he would get killed it would be Pat Tillman x a million.

March 2, 2012  08:18 AM ET

These guys are so dillusional. What's next, LeBron James is going to be an astronaunt AND the person who cures cancer when his career is over? Koo koo.

March 2, 2012  08:25 AM ET

I was thinking of retiring from my job and looking at a career in the NFL.

March 2, 2012  08:25 AM ET

Must be a slow day at the Plain Dealer.............

March 2, 2012  08:26 AM ET

He'll end up pushing a pen as an analyst IF he's lucky.

March 2, 2012  08:27 AM ET
QUOTE(#3):

I was thinking of retiring from my job and looking at a career in the NFL.

Call this number. You may be overqualified though. 1-800-VIKINGS.

March 2, 2012  08:32 AM ET
QUOTE(#5):

He'll end up pushing a pen as an analyst IF he's lucky.

There would be really nothing else he could do there anyways. They couldn't really put him in the field, there would too much of a chance that he would be recognized or his past status would be possibly too distracting. Other than that it's also very unlikely he would get hired in the first place.

March 2, 2012  08:35 AM ET

The Culinary Institute of America? Wow, I'm impressed. That place turns out some of the best chefs in the world.

Hmmm....could it be that he's confusing being a chef with playing for Kansas City?

March 2, 2012  08:36 AM ET
QUOTE(#8):

The Culinary Institute of America? Wow, I'm impressed. That place turns out some of the best chefs in the world.Hmmm....could it be that he's confusing being a chef with playing for Kansas City?

Oh good call... That makes a lot more sense.

March 2, 2012  08:48 AM ET
QUOTE(#8):

The Culinary Institute of America?

During player introductions, that's where Jerad Allen says he went to school.

March 2, 2012  08:55 AM ET
QUOTE(#8):

The Culinary Institute of America? Wow, I'm impressed. That place turns out some of the best chefs in the world.Hmmm....could it be that he's confusing being a chef with playing for Kansas City?

They are famous for steak there

March 2, 2012  08:57 AM ET

If CIA stand for" Cleveland In Abyss" then I too have considered it.

March 2, 2012  08:58 AM ET
QUOTE(#4):

Must be a slow day at the Plain Dealer.............

Any day the Cuyahoga River is not on fire is a slow day. Hard to ever top that one.

March 2, 2012  08:59 AM ET
QUOTE(#6):

Call this number. You may be overqualified though. 1-800-VIKINGS.

ROTFLMAO

March 2, 2012  09:02 AM ET

After hearing the commercial this morning for CIA recruitment, I am also considering a career change.

I'm sure there is a place for an old, fat, white guy in the defense of our great country!

<hums God Bless America while working on February monthly summaries...>

March 2, 2012  09:06 AM ET
QUOTE(#15):

After hearing the commercial this morning for CIA recruitment, I am also considering a career change. I'm sure there is a place for an old, fat, white guy in the defense of our great country! <hums God Bless America while working on February monthly summaries...>

....and looks out window to see if anyone tailed me home!

March 2, 2012  09:07 AM ET

We had lunch at the Culinary Institute of America outside of San Francisco some years back. We were with a local friend who knew people there, so we got the royal treatment. I had the sweetbreads, which were absolutely delicious. My daughter, who was about 10 at the time, just asked for a grilled cheese sandwich. They made it with gruyere cheese on fresh-baked sourdough bread. Nicest grilled cheese I've ever seen.

March 2, 2012  09:08 AM ET
QUOTE(#16):

....and looks out window to see if anyone tailed me home!

Lots of old, fat, white guys to choose from, aren't there?

March 2, 2012  09:11 AM ET
QUOTE(#7):

There would be really nothing else he could do there anyways. They couldn't really put him in the field, there would too much of a chance that he would be recognized or his past status would be possibly too distracting. Other than that it's also very unlikely he would get hired in the first place.

First off, good luck with that. What would his qualifications be? That he can run and act like a spoiled brat and not very good at working as a team? Hmm...I'm sure the CIA would take a pass. Let's face it, most military occupations would take a pass on pro athletes because they only care about one thing--themselves. Pat Tillman was the exception to that rule. Second of all, I had a similar job when I was in the Army and several years ago when I heard the CIA was hiring people, I actually considered it. They said that I wasn't supposed to tell people I was going for a job interview with the CIA. In other words, the mere fact that he mentioned it would cause the CIA to turn him down, EVEN IF he were qualified, which he isn't. He's probably so stupid he can't tie his own shoes and whatever he was smoking when he thought the CIA would want him must have permanently affected his brain.

Oh, and the SEALS wouldn't take Tiger now anyway. First of all, he's too old. Second, he's too recognizable. Third, I bet his knee would cause him to fail the physical.

 
March 2, 2012  09:13 AM ET
QUOTE(#6):

Call this number. You may be overqualified though. 1-800-VIKINGS.

Or 1-800-COWBOYS

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