Dark Lord of Sports

Rejoice! The Dark Lord is Back!

07:59 PM ET 07.07

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Yes it is true my loyal, yet deranged, followers. The Dark Lord of Sports is back. Thank you, thank you, please stay on your knees. After an extended hiatus in the belly of the abyss I have returned to wreak havoc on the world of sports once again! Truth be told, I actually missed your silly throwdowns and moronic blog posts. It brings me great satisfaction to witness the depth of mankind's ignorance. Your petty arguments bring a tortured smile to my rotting face and when the Dark Lord smiles, babies die. I like that.Anyway, I have returned and have decided to bless you unfaithful…

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The Dark Lord Hates The New England Patriots

12:59 PM ET 10.17

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Welcome back my loyal, yet depraved, followers to my column. This week I turn my ire and disgust at the hated New England Patriots. How I hate the Patriots and everything they stand for. The weekly hype and hysteria covering the Patriots is overwhelming and idiotic to say the least. They have already been crowned the champions of the NFL and it is barely October! Indeed, some foolish mortals have begun mentioning the Patriots and undeafeated season in the same breath!You are indeed fools if you believe that. Well the Dark Lord is fed up with the Patriots and will put them in their place once…

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The Putrid Rankings

01:40 PM ET 10.11

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Welcome to the Dark Lords first ever installment of the Putrid Rankings. Here I will sort NFL teams in descending order based on their overall putridness. Win/loss record is a factor but not an overwhelming one. Team dsyfunction and abysmal play factor in also. The Dark Lord also takes great stock in team distractions. Now on to the rankings! 32. Colts (5-0): Team harmony is at an all time high as the Colts seem to roll on despite missing key contributors on offense. Not to mention being the only team in NFL history to start 5-0 in 3 consecutive…

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