Dan TM is Stupendous Man

Absurd Predictions: Cincinnati Bengals 2008

10:42 AM ET 06.24

Views: 1094
Comments: 8

Don't worry, fans and haters, I haven't given up on getting through all 20 teams before the season starts. I've just been really busy this week, so--What's that? There are 32 teams?! Holy Holly Golightly! I'd better get through these faster!Today’s Absurd Prediction: Over the 2nd half of the season, the Bengals’ defense will be ranked in the top 16. Doing so would, mathematically, put them in the upper half of the league’s ranks. Here’s why I think this long-suffering unit could finally have some success. 1) The…

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Absurd Predictions: Chicago Bears 2008

05:42 PM ET 06.09

Views: 1491
Comments: 6

Today’s absurd prediction:Someone who isn't on the Bears' roster yet starts and wins a game at quarterback. Right now, the Bears only have Rex Grossman and Kyle Orton on the roster. They didn't pick up any free agents, and they didn't take any in the draft. They'll probably want a third-stringer when all is said and done, so they'll nab an undrafted rookie like Paul Smith or Brad Roach, or a still-available free agent, like Byron Leftwich or Kelly Holcomb. And somewhere between injuries and/or bad play, this third QB will get a chance, and…

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Absurd Predictions: Carolina Panthers 2008

10:54 AM ET 06.05

Views: 1637
Comments: 16

Today's Absurd Prediction: The Panthers will once again fail to send any players to Hawai'i. Last year, the Panthers didn't have a single Pro Bowler, not even an injury replacement. This year, I expect the same. This means Steve Smith and Julius Peppers not having a renaissance year, DeAngelo Williams not stepping up as the starting RB, the NFC East linemen dominating those selections largely based on name recognition, and none of the young guys turning the corner to be come superstars at this time. Coaching Changes: The Less Things Change, The More They Stay The Same…

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Curly Lambeau | about 1 year ago

If you're tired of that joke, btw, you could consider a name change. Something like, I'da'know, Michael Bolton or something. ...SEE?? see how funny I am. I'm FUNNY! (I tell that to people, because it's not something people notice about me right away, but...yeah... Funny kid. That's me.)

Get it? DaVinci Code...? ...'cuz your name is the same as the guy who wrote it? Betcha never heard that one before! ...I know, I know... I'm a comedic genius. No need to tell me. ...unless you want to

Miss your blogs. You must be spending your time working on the sequel to the DaVinci Code.

Big Ben68 | about 1 year ago

I LOVE Calvin & Hobbes!!!!!

KPKahder - | about 1 year ago

You ? Sober? I thought I saw a blurb about that on Truth and Rumors... 1000 posts debating whether it was true or not.. You want the results of the poll ? :-)