The Bike Lady

LEAFS ROADKILL UPDATE: Paul Maurice's Pile Gathers Dust

08:19 PM ET 11.09

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A few months back, Fannation faithful learned about Toronto Maple Leafs ex-babysitter PAUL MAURICE's attempt to unload his $2.5 million real estate pile.Having been shown the door by the Leafs brass, Maurice, who hails from the northern Ontario boonies, no longer required a city-slicker address.But word has it that offers for the overpriced reno have not been flowing in quite as expected.At all.Not even trickling in.Still, showing the same stubborn pride that was instrumental in dragging the Leafs down to the bottom of the NHL pile last season, Maurice refuses to budge on the…

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Leafs Should Wear Sexy Jerseys the Color of Baboon Genitalia

06:53 PM ET 11.09

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We all know that red cars go faster. And, thanks to a recent study, we now also know that red makes women sexier to men. But did you know that competitors who sport predominantly red uniforms are more likely to win than those who don't?This is a statistical fact. Men in white coats have studied the athletes-who-wear-red phenomenon and published their findings. If they hadn't, I wouldn't have stumbled across the info while googling "red bicycle tires". I must admit it was a bit of hard slogging reading through the study's findings. But the parts about…

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Paul "Simple Life" Maurice Flogs Digs

09:34 AM ET 07.17

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Ahhhhhh, the simple life!.... How nice for ex Leafs baby-sitter, Paul Maurice, that, unlike the rest of us poor slobs, he has the CHOICE to work or not to work. "It's better to be paid than not," said Maurice in an interview just before he was canned. "We don't own four homes and ten cars. It's the simple life. But I'd much rather be working." Indeed. He doesn't own four homes, just one home the size of four. And four cars the size of ten (including a fully-loaded Caddy SUV and a brand spanking new mini-van for the Nanny).Ahhhhhh, the…

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