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  • 01:18 PM ET  09.12
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     Lance is returning to the Tour De France next year to try and win his record 8th cycling title. Top 10 reasons Lance Armstrong is returning to cyclingI've slept with this many actresses today**** LaRue 09.SEP.0810. Wants to make one of those Gillette commercials with Tiger, Roger Federer and Jeter.9. Like many armies before him, enjoys dominating France every year.8. Saw Michael Phelps win 8 gold medals and figured maybe winning 8 Tour De Frances would finally make bicycling relevent. 7. Somebody told him that he didn't have the balls to compete in another Tour…
  • 12:16 PM ET  09.12
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Dear Patriot Fans, I know your probably standing on the edge of a bridge right now, because you think your football season is over. And I regret to inform you that this indeed will be the winter of your discontent. Look, I know you think football season (life) is now over for you, but it's not like I ended the career of your beloved Tom Brady. It could have been much, much worse. Just ask Joe Theisman. Let's face it Boston, you've had a great run on my watch. But yesterday at around 1:10 EST we had to shut down Heaven because you flooded our servers with your prayers. While I…
  • 03:42 PM ET  09.06
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BMDP has friends at an advertising agency that works with the NFL. And while the NFL is as popular as ever, they still need a little shot in the **** to help sell tickets sometimes. Our source let us know what each team is using as a motto to help them try and get as many new fans as possible. Giants - Hey maybe Eli Manning doesn't suck as bad as we originally thought.Eagles - If you like drinking and swearing, you'll love rooting for the Eagles. Who are we kidding, you live in Philly. Drinking and swearing is what you do best.Tampa Bay - Why aren't you watching the Rays right…

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